True Confessions: I'm Not a Positive Thinker

As much as I may seem like a cheerleader for positive thinking I have to tell you that I'm not so good at it. In fact, most of the time I really struggle to believe in a higher power at all. To tell you the truth, I have a lot of mixed emotions about the movie The Secret. One of my favorite Tweeps Scott Brandon Hoffman has said, "If you think a naked genie is going to swoop down and hand you a bag of money you've got another thing coming." I get that God is not Santa Claus.

The Secret forgot to mention the concept of divine timing and action. I'm willing to be wrong but it seems like some dreams take time and action. When I tend to lose it in my own life I go back to nature. Nature just is. It doesn't want to be anything it's not. It doesn't want to rush the process. It appreciates all the steps of unfoldment. Another one of my wise friends Kevin Pritchett reminded me that an acorn doesn't become an oak tree overnight. Of course, positive thinking can help you enjoy the journey more and appreciate being in the "flow" or "vortex" or whatever you like to call it.

Recently, I have experienced a lot of disappointments. To give you a little insight, almost three years ago I was layed off of a very good paying job. I was prepared for a 6-8 month financial emergency just not a three year one. I will share with that I'm "in recovery" and truly grateful. Being without a job did provide me more time for spritual practices. I threw myself into everything I could until it was sort of becoming like well . . . a job. It just wasn't fun anymore. I had to wonder: Can a person become too spiritual? If you answered 5 out of the 7 questions you might be too spiritual.

  • Are you always reading spiritual books but never fiction (or any non-spiritual books)?
  • Do you spend all your time and money on retreats? workshops? sessions? Do you do this without having money left over for important things like rent, food and clothing?
  • How many rituals do you go through before your day begins?
  • Do you spend all your time in a practice and not in "life"?
  • Do you hang out all day, chilling because you are "allowing" life to happen?
  • Would you take the advice of a guru, practitoner, or reader over your own intuition?
  • Are you losing your compassion? Criticizing someone for the cold he or she "created"?

Getting back to my recent malaise, I just came to the conclusion that I'm not creating the life I want. A friend of mine commented that she has gotten everything she has wanted. And I thought, "Wow I haven't gotten anything I have wanted." Although, I will acknowledge not manifesting can be a blessing. Maybe so-and-so was not the right man for me? Or maybe that truly wasn't the right job.

Anyway, as I became more spiritual my life just got worse. I get that spirituality isn't all about the manifestation of stuff. I do enjoy helping others just for the sake of doing it. I like making people happy and sometimes I'm even a part of their healing process and I'm honored. I just felt like I climbed the mountain to meet my guru and I met me. Just me. I think I secretly was hoping that someone or something would come along and save the day but that that day hasn't happened. It's not going to happen. I have a very different view of spirituality now. Maybe the idea of God is simply a coping mechanism? I'm not quite sure I am completely set in my definition of what God is but a few quotes have helped me form my opinion:

You must be the change you wish to see in the world.

~ Mohandas Gandhi

“Always be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle.”

~ Plato

"God helps those who help themselves."

Now that I have gotten that off my chest. I don't want to leave the wonderful eclectic eating readers feeling down. Even though I'm not so good at it I will make an attempt to leave on a positive note. I was reminded by one of my favorite Social Media peeps and musicians Sharon Bautista about good stuff. One day on Facebook Sharon posted this, "Things I LOVE: Sunshine, Horses, Music, Astrology, Kissing, Eddie Vedder. How about you?:

It's good to focus on what you love. This reminded me that when I think of "the divine" I think of "high quality". I love Coltrane, the color orange, Cy Twombly paintings. pink peonies, a good nap, red wine, dark chocolate, pug dogs, Ewan MacGregor's smile, the smell of burning sage, walks near the Chicago River . . . I could go on and on. Please let me know your "loves". I have yet to manifest everything I want and there is no 100% guarantee that life is going to pour out like a Vegas slot machine but I do admit it is MORE FUN and I intend to enjoy the ride.

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Tags: spirituality

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  • Woah. I'm mesmerized. According to your list I am exactly zero percent spiritual. Crap!

  • I don't know if anyone can be 0% spiritual.:)

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