Archive for September 2017

A Fifth Grade Spelling Bee is High Drama

Few situations require a more unique display of knowledge than a spelling bee. I can’t think of many other instances where someone stands in front of a crowd and essentially says, “Here’s what I know.” Jeopardy has somewhat the same vibe, but if a contestant misses a question they can make up for it by... Read more »

My Childhood Obsession With Wrestling was Short-Lived

Sometime in late 1987 I became obsessed with professional wrestling. I can’t remember the exact date, but I know that by early 1988 I was all-in. I was a chubby nine-year-old kid who believed wrestling was real, and that Hulk Hogan got those muscles by training, saying his prayers, and taking his vitamins. I was... Read more »

America Has Fought Wars for Those Who Kneel, Not for the Flag

Imagine a scene where 70,000 people come together in the same space. A song starts to play, and everyone in the crowd stands at attention and looks in the same direction. Some people sing along, others remain silent, but everyone is reverent. Except for one person. One person chooses to kneel in silent protest. He... Read more »
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If Kim Jong Un is Rocket Man, What Songs Apply to Trump?

The president addressed the United Nations yesterday, and to no one’s surprise he often sounded more like Bruce Willis’s character from Die Hard than the actual leader of the free world. The only thing missing was “Yippee Ki-yay Motherfucker” as he disposed of the bad guy. His speech included a reference to Kim Jong Un... Read more »

National Hug Your Boss Day is a Horrible Idea

I like celebrations. Whenever an interesting “National Something Day” arises, we try to do a little something to celebrate the day. Monday is National Cheeseburger Day, so cheeseburgers for dinner. (Not to be confused with National Double Cheeseburger Day, which is also today.) There’s always some National Day celebration, and even if it’s just silliness,... Read more »

I Created New Pokemon for My Son's Birthday

My oldest son turned thirteen years old yesterday. He’s one of my favorite people in the world. He’s got a sharp mind, kind soul, and is quick to laugh. But one of his best qualities is his excitability. The kid likes what he likes, and if you spent ten minutes with him you’d know what... Read more »
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My Son's Baseball Obsession Has Reawakened My Baseball Obsession

Sometime around fourth or fifth grade I engaged in one of the most pointless debates to ever occur in an elementary school. It was late 1987 or 1988, and another kid in my grade and I debated the merits of the Cubs’ 1982 first round draft selection. The Cubs had the first pick and they... Read more »