Egad. I’m up from another night of six and a half hours of sleep, maybe, but probably just six. I want that other hour, but my mind keeps going late into the night and…oh well. All my mindfulness yoga notwithstanding, and my ability to truly relax for minutes at a time when I am awake is sometimes kaput once the lights are out.
It’s the list of tomorrow’s events and responsibilities, plus the “shoulda, woulda, coulda” of the recent past. It’s my own stuff, but it’s also work. As a Designer I have always been able to visualize lots of details in my environment plus those creative changes that I have made or am working with or already completed. I most often really like what I’ve done or what’s coming soon, but I do spend time wondering and picturing the options that I didn’t think of soon enough. Sometimes (quite rarely, thankfully) a client decides to do other than what I suggest and/or changes something and I lie awake wondering if the end result will now actually suck (sorry for that word, but, hey…).
Eventually, I stop pondering and fall asleep. In the morning, I see it with a somewhat better perspective. And sometimes I reflect on what I can do to try and better the situation, mostly for the client, but (of course) also for me. After all, I’m the pro, so If I judge a “fix” is feasible, shouldn’t I speak up?
Luckily, there are many happy reasons to stay awake and ponder – like anticipating a vacation the next morning—but when it’s a bad kind of sleeplessness, waking up and put it at least partially behind me is about as much of a relief as there can be.
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