After hours and hours of grilling, Democratic members of the Senate Judiciary Committee got down to the nitty gritty, the real dirt on their interrogation of Supreme Court Justice nominee Brent Kavanaugh. A transcript of the hearings follows:
Sen. Richard Blumenthal (D-Conn.): I have here in my hands the secret documents from your time in the White House. Judge, can you tell me why you hate children?
Judge Kavanaugh: Excuse me?
Blumenthal: This is proof positive that you would kill Obamacare, denying little Tommy Tucker the medical treatment for his whooping cough, hepatitis, scarlet fever and lyme disease.
Kavanaugh: Um, I think you might have read something there--something that I haven't seen, by the way--that isn't there. If I can try to answer, the constitutional principles involved....
Blumenthal: A simple "yes" or "no" answer will suffice. Do you want to see little Tommy Tucker die:
Kavanaugh: Obviously I....
Blumenthal: Since you're not going to answer let me move on in the little time I have left. Will you force women to resort to have back-alley abortions?
Kavanaugh: I'll repeat what I said in last night's hearing. The constitutional principle of Roe v. Wade....
Blumenthal: I'll take that as a "yes," that you want women to die from coat hangers. Would you convict Trump, that rat-bastard?
Kavanaugh: Senator, with all due respect, you know that I cannot comment on matters that would come before me in adjudication.
Blumenthal: I'll take that as a "no," that you would let a scoundrel stay in office despite his planning to turn America over to Vladimir Putin.
Kavanaugh: I ....
Blumenthal: Twenty first-graders and six educators were murdered in the deadliest grade-school shooting in U.S. history at Sandy Hook Elementary School. Do own an assault rifle? Do you remember telling President Bush when you were his aide that the possession of land mines should be legal?
Kavanaugh: I don't think I would have said that; I don't remember ever saying such a thing.
Blumenthal: Moving on. Do you pick your nose?
Kavanaugh: What does that have anything to do with....
Blumenthal: In public or private? I'll take that as a "yes."
Kavanaugh: [His answer is interrupted by shouting by planted protestors.]
Blumenthal: Do you eat your boogers?
Here’s how to subscribe to the Barbershop so that you’ll be notified when I post: Type your email address in the box and click the "create subscription" button. My list is completely spam free, and you can opt out at any time.