If you send your kid to a public school, you are a bad person

This is a parody of a Slate article, "If you send your kid to a private school, you are a bad person: A manifesto," by Allison Benedikt, Aug. 29. 2013. She posits that the best way to improve public schools is for all parents to send their children there. Her article is not to be taken seriously, which explains this parody--the only response that it deserves. 

You are a bad person if you send your children to public school. Not bad like murderer bad--but bad like ruining-our-nation's-system-of-private-schools bad, the only hope for parents who want to choose what's best for their children. So, pretty bad.

Allison BenediktIt seems to me that if Americans were more invested in private schools, public schools would be forced to be better. If your local school stinks--but many don't--you need to vote with your feet. Demand a charter school. Or a voucher school. You don't cure an illness by feeding it, even though people like Allison Benedikt think that everyone going to lousy schools is just the ticket.

What's going to convince them to change if people are banging on their doors to get in? Just say:  "Oh, we know that your school isn't all it should be, so we're sending you our children. It might take a generation or two for your school to get better, but that's all right." At least with Benedikt.

So, here's the solution: Everyone pull their kids out of public schools. If there's no place else to send them, that's okay. It might take a generation or two for enough charter schools to get set up. Or it might take a generation or two for government to come up with enough vouchers to satisfy the demand.

What, but the heck, you're children will be suffering for the common good, as Benedikt would have it.

And if you think that I've lost my mind, remember that I'm not serious. But Benedict is.

For more commentary on Benedikt's essay, go to Red State and With Both Hands.

Order an autographed copy of my new historical novel, "Madness: The War of 1812" direct from my private stock at a large discount off the publisher's price. Go to www.madness1812.com

Leave a comment

  • ChicagoNow is full of win

    Welcome to ChicagoNow.

    Meet our bloggers,
    post comments, or
    pitch your blog idea.

  • Advertisement:
  • Subscribe to The Barbershop

    Enter your email address:

    Delivered by FeedBurner

  • Dennis Byrne’s Facebook Fan Page

  • Like me on Facebook

  • google-site-verification: googlefdc32e3d5108044f.html
  • Meet The Blogger

    Dennis Byrne

    Chicago Tribune contributing op-ed columnist and author of forthcoming historical novel, "Madness: The War of 1812." Reporter, editor and columnist for Chicago Sun-Times and Chicago Daily News. Freelance writer and editor.

  • Our National Debt

  • Twitter

  • Categories

  • Tags

  • Recent Comments

  • Monthly Archives

  • /Users/dennisby/Desktop/trailer.mp4
  • Latest on ChicagoNow

  • Advertisement: