Here's a top ten reasons bit that Letterman would never use about the president on tonight's show: Ten reasons why Obama has worn out his welcome.
10. He had his scheduler call the National Hockey League to
see if he could throw out the first puck.
9. If someone reaches for a can of herring, he can be counted
on to show up at the opening.
8. He turned up in Dora the Explorer's backpack.
7. He wanted to sing "Take me out to the ballgame" during
the seventh inning stretch, but even the Cubs wouldn't have him.
6. Tom Delay had already taken his spot on "Dancing with the
5. The Alexandria Cub Scouts said they'd be glad to have him
as a den leader if he promised not to lecture the Webelos about the benefits of
his health care plan.
4. He's scheduled to be in the American Lung Association's
latest public service announcement explaining the hazards of cigarette smoking.
3. In danger of running out of shows to appear on, he
recently has been courting the QVC shopping channel to pitch over-stocked
Detroit Lions jackets.
2. He has hired an agent to get him the role of Sheridan
Whiteside in the classic play "The Man who came to Dinner" in Door County summer stock
1. Even Joe
Bidden Biden is so sick of seeing him all over
television that the vice president only feels safe watching re-runs of Nick
Baker's Weird Creatures on the Smithsonian cable channel.