Audibles From the Long Snapper: String Almost Played Out Edition

Audibles From the Long Snapper: String Almost Played Out Edition

NOTE: I have not received many emails when it comes to the Fantasy Playoffs. The prize is cool (6 pizzas delivered to you from Lou Malnati's) and I don't want to tell them to piss off. It is an easy game to play and a fun way to generate a rooting interest for these postseason games. Just let me know in the comments of this post if you're interested. I''ll explain the rules at the end of next week.

Why Mike Mulligan's Become the Worst Columnist in Chicago

Whether you agree or disagree with  the media's attack on Halas Hall in the aftermath of the Jay Cutler era (and I'm done with that argument) it is columns like this one from Mike Mulligan that make want this "end of newspapers" things to come quicker than expected. Forget about the opinion. Just look at this dose of fact:

The Bears have drafted players who have started, but haven't hit on enough starting players. They have signed free agents who have contributed, but very few who are regular contributors.

So the Bears haven't drafted starters? And they haven't signed starters as free agents? So are we to assume the entirety of the Bears starting roster were acquired through trades? Folks using the events of the last five weeks to draw conclusions about the organization are misguided. 2012 will bear that out. (Side note: Mulligan is also a plainly bad writer. It seems he's just written a bunch of sentences and randomly dropped them on paper.)

How to Make the Pro Bowl a Meaningful Event

Here's my plan:

  • Hire an elite panel of intelligent former players, personnel men, scouts and skilled members of the media. These men should be paid to watch every single snap of every single football game played in the NFL.
  • Eliminate players and fans from the process. Neither of these groups have any idea what's happening around the league. They know their teams and, for the most part, know other teams exclusively through ESPN/NFL Network highlights and whichever clubs are given the primetime platform.
  • Stick this entire panel in a room for a few days and have them debate each and every position. Film it, edit it and make it a several-hour special on the NFL Network. The awards would have more weight than ever before and fans would be glued to the broadcast as they rooted for their favorite players.

The only Pro Bowl award I care about, by the way, is Corey Graham winning the special teams honor. It just doesn't seem to matter who the Bears lose on their special teams units, Dave Toub finds ways to get the best out of the men he has. I believe Toub is going to be a damn good head coach (and Adam Schefter is rumoring him as a candidate in Jacksonville).

2012 Season Opponents 

Already announced:

Home: Seattle, St. Louis, Houston, Indianapolis, Detroit, Green Bay, Minnesota.

Away: Arizona, San Francisco, Jacksonville, Tennessee, Detroit, Green Bay, Minnesota

The Bears will finish third in the NFC North, meaning they'll now also face Carolina at Soldier Field. Their final opponent will be whomever finishes third in the NFC East. If Philadelphia beats Washington Sunday afternoon, that would mean the loser of Giants v. Cowboys would fall to the third position.

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  • The Pro Bowl is more risk than reward and should be eliminated.

  • In reply to Viva:

    +1

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    I think the NFL is ready for a more NBA style all-star format, with skills competitions and the like. I'd kind of enjoy seeing a kicking competition with Hawaii's great conditions, and I think there are some other fun contests that could be worked out as well.

    As far as the actual game... I wouldn't want to go the MLB route and make home-field advantage a factor in the Super-bowl. Perhaps there could be an incentive for the following season's non-conference games?

  • Dave Toub is a brilliant tactician, and he will be missed if he gets the opportunity.

  • In reply to Viva:

    +alotmorethan1

  • GP, I think Burfict is a MLB, so basically lach's apprentice. Maybe lach can clean up his attitude and make him a bear.

    I have to admit that after looking at some mike floyd footage and his bio stats (size, speed) yesterday, I wouldn't mind breaking my rule and getting that dude. Problem is the first round is always so fluid. If there is no good interior olinemen or a great DB, it’s a toss-up for who’s left. If vontaze gets taken before our pick and there isn’t a good olinemen or DB, and a big-assed #1 WR is still there, I would be ok with that.

    You know what, I just want a decent fucking draft. It doesn’t have to be exceptional, because that would just be moronic of me to expect from angelo… but just solid. No obvious busts (igelesitas/poolboy) or reaches (benchpress boy), just good solid long-term contributors at most picks. Ahhhh, never fucking mind, who am I kidding? He’ll give away our first and the extra third to move up 5 spots in the 2nd to take a DE who just had total reconstructive knee surgery. Fml.

    Shady, sorry I had to bug out early maing. I’ll jump into your game next time.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    Jeff, I think it would be a worthwhile post once the season ends to see your draft board. Top 32 players who are eligible to be drafted by the Bears, in order. Would Luck be your #1? Would any QB make our top 10?

    The exercise of listing all 32 is interesting because then you account for the possibility of trades.

  • In reply to NewBearInTown:

    If we trade down with our #1, I give up. I really do.

    Floyd is the kind of wideout the Bears need, I would like to see him taken too, even though I despise Notre Dame.

  • would you rather draft Floyd, or sign a Bowe/Jackson?

  • In reply to evantonio:

    exactly evan. My general rule is don't take a #1wr in rd1, but if he's all that left at that spot for the value (no more OL, DB, MLB), take him.

    I would much rather get a known entity at #1 wr in FA. Get a bowe or tjack plus maybe b.edwards for cheap. I don't think he's another roy.... roy was washed up and just doesn't give a shit anymore. Beside, for some reason he looks like a fucking old man with duckfeet out there now. Save the draft pick for another position of need.

    My top guys on D are vontaze and the honey badger... I have to do some research on o guys.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    I sure as hell wouldnt pass up Floyd for Edwards. Only thing he has proven in this league is that hes not very good. Floyd is another Larry Fitzgerald.........big, strong, and great hands.

  • In reply to #76 Mongo Murph:

    I meant pass up floyd for vontaze or the honey badger... and get a #1 WR in FA.

  • Dunno, if there are 2 or 3 popular QBs on the board and some bad fits on defense, I wouldn't be too upset trading down 3-5 spots to pick up an extra 2nd rounder.

    But I was really more looking at what happens if we trade back into the 1st round with out 2nd and 3rd rounders.

  • In reply to NewBearInTown:

    no QBs in rds 1 or 2 please.

    I don't trust jerry (or martz) with that VERY very tricky pick (maybe thee most tricky).

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    I respectfully disagree - I think if we end up in position to take a top 3 QB prospect for some reason (and it could easily happen in our position), then I'd like us to do it. Our problems at WR could be solved in this FA class. If we have a shot at a franchise LB or FS, then I'd say go ahead, but I'd be OK with getting a QB that can take the reins in 3 years if our love affair with Cutty goes south.
    I'd like us to get a good corner but picking a zone corner in round 1 just doesn't make sense value-wise...if we had a different HC, sure...

  • In reply to MikeBrownhadaPosse:

    hmmmm... interesting MBP. I'd have to see who it was and burfict and matheiu AND floyd (or someone equally good/big) would have to be gone for me.

  • I'll like Notre Dame enough for both of us. Just get Floyd!

  • Scariest non-division games I see on the schedule are San Francisco and Carolina. I think that Carolina will prove to be the toughest, with the possible exception of our NFC East opponent, because Cam Newton is a beast and they're going to put a good team around him. I think the 49rs will see a modest drop off next season, but will still probably win their division.

  • The Bears have excelled in special teams because of both Dave Toub and Angelo. JA has done a better job filling special teams than any other area which isn't necessarily a great accomplishment. Take away Devin Hester and I ask you, are they still great?

  • In reply to TracDaddy:

    johnny knox did make the pro bowl as a returner. so that's something, no?

  • In reply to evantonio:

    Yes. I'm just wondering how much having Hester has helped due to the fact teams don't like to kick to him. I guess what I'm saying is, would Toub still be in line for a HC gig without Hester in his cap?

  • In reply to TracDaddy:

    Exhibit A: the fake return this year.

    So, yes, I think he would be.

  • In reply to MikeBrownhadaPosse:

    Exhibit B: http://www.nfl.com/videos/chicago-bears/09000d5d81299326/Bears-failed-fake-punt

    still pisses me off.

  • In reply to TracDaddy:

    jesus trac, stop the fucking angelo blowjobs of late please.

    First, you think JA has ANYTHING to do with picks toub wants on his team? Toub say I want this guy asshat, please get him... JA says "uhhhh, oook dave".

    Second, JA has nothing to do with it except that maybe the picks he made to be D or O starters invariably aren't good enough to start in the NFL so they end up as above average non-first team starters on specials. Pretty scary actually.

    (ok, so I'm exaggerating to be funny/get my point across... but you get the idea. And yes Jeff, I believe the good things JA has done are either the result of other good coaches telling him who to pick, or blind luck. His actual stats over the years point more to blind luck than anything)

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    Trigger happy huh? he he. Your second last paragraph is exactly what I was eluding to, no worries mate.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    Brandan Ayenbadejo, Tim Shaw, Danniel Manning, Johhny Knox, Corey Graham, Izzy, Alex Brown, Julius Peppers, Robbie Gould, and The Skunk have all done well under Toub's tutelage.

    Winning field position battles, blocking kicks, making kicks, and hitting home-runs has been a point of emphasis for our club since Jerry took over. Jerry has made Toub's job a priority, and Toub has exceeded all expectations...

  • In reply to Viva:

    agree and I give it to him that he sees toub is a legit coach who knows how to be successful and therefor he supports whatever toub asks for. After that, not much can be attributed to jerry.

    Look I get sick of hearing me say it too… I just don’t know how/why dave toub’s leadership and success can be attributed to angelo… unless you call what I said above brilliant. I call that common sense. Hire people who are smarter and better than you, and you’ll always be successful. At least jerry did it once.

  • Jeff, i'm in for the playoffs thingy. Why the hell now... and my wife would love me for the pizzas. Might help her understand why I spend on the time I do on he blog with you guys... although pizzas have nothing to do with it. Anyway, I'm in.

  • As I emailed, I'm in for the competition, but I'll need to find a worthy charity to send the (non-kosher) pizzas to.

  • In reply to NewBearInTown:

    I'm a charity case for decent pizza.

  • In reply to NewBearInTown:

    How bout the Samaritan across the street?

  • In reply to NewBearInTown:

    Send em my way.

  • In reply to NewBearInTown:

    Tha B'nai Buttsteak Kosher Foodbank. They'll bless the pizza, or whatever they have to do. I'll email the address.

  • In reply to Crunch Buttsteak:

    Hahahahahaha

  • Jeff, I am interested in the fantasy playoffs... although I doubt I will win without a fair amount of luck.

    Toub is one of my favorite NFL coaches, if not the most.... I don't know exactly how much of his success comes from the great support he gets from Lovie (particularly in the form of starters contributing to STs, but also organizational support), but the man is just an excellent coach -- he consistently gets the most out of his players tactically and motivationally, and is a sound judge of talent.

  • Yeah sure Jeff, I'll give the pizza thing a go.

  • I'm in for sure - the pizza in Virginia is godawful shit.

  • In reply to MikeBrownhadaPosse:

    too funny.

  • In reply to Viva:

    I kid you not - it is worse than what passes for pizza in Omaha.
    The sauces are terrible, the cheeses are terrible. I have yet to eat a good, not great, pizza here.

  • In reply to MikeBrownhadaPosse:

    Mike, Fireworks in Leesburg is pretty good. Wood fire baked, all local ingredients...

    But I'm in for Chicago Pizza!

  • In reply to BobbyDouglass:

    Thanks for the suggestion! I will be up in the DC area in a couple of weeks so I'll see if I can talk the wifey into a carb break for some pizza. Looks like there is another location in Arlington.
    You know the area well?

  • In reply to MikeBrownhadaPosse:

    Been in Leesburg for 16 years now, originally from southern IL. Don't know much closer to DC, I try to avoid it...

  • Also...it's Fantasy but not-player based. You pick an offense, defense and special teams. Once you pick them once, they're off limits to you the rest of the postseason. Join up folks, the pizza is worth it.

  • In reply to Jeff Hughes:

    i sent an electronic mail correspondence but i will double up here. i'm in. new york pizza just doesn't cut it.

  • In reply to evantonio:

    See for kosher pizza, the best place is in Brooklyn. But they sell their stuff frozen in Chicago.

  • In reply to NewBearInTown:

    where in brooklyn? is it smiling pizza? cause that's my local. but i don't think their sausage slices are very kosher.

  • In reply to evantonio:

    you guys are complaining about the pizza in NY???? Shit, you should try the stuff here. I've never been an east coast guy so I'm no pro, but I know bad food when I try it.

    They say it's the water.

    We have some good brewery/pizza places, but it's not real pizza, it's like a bastard child/mix of chicago and ny styles. The beer is damn god though: http://www.pizzaport.com/

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    NYC tap water is supposed to have a high content of these micro-organisms that look like little lobsters (IIRC), and that is supposed to contribute to the "flavor".

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    i was joke-complaining about the pizza. nyp is the tits. though, to be fair, there is an ungodly amount of terrible pizza in the city that gets by on tourist dollars because they're able to tout their new yorkiness.

  • In reply to evantonio:

    Mendelson's in Borough Park. Its not the greatest pizza ever, but its a great pie.

  • In reply to NewBearInTown:

    italian jews?

  • In reply to Jeff Hughes:

    Jeff, will sandbagging be allowed?

  • In reply to Jeff Hughes:

    How does that work? How will special teams be graded?

  • In reply to Jeff Hughes:

    I'm in. We had lou's pizza for Christmas dinner, but you can never have too much Chicago pizza. And Lou's is the best.

  • This should have been posted in the last thread, but I am slow.

    McCown is 20 of 30 for 254 yds, 1 td, and 3 picks as a Chicago Bear. He has 8 carries for 38 yds rushing. He has not been sacked.

    Hanie was 18 of 36 for 254 yds, 2 td, and 3 picks vs. the Raiders.
    He had 5 carries for 50 yds rushing. He was sacked 4 times.

    McCown looked sharper and more poised than Hanie did in his first start. He had the disadvantage of being without Forte and Knox. But he played against a weaker defense, and gained much of his yardage after the game was lost. There was very little pressure on him; no one expected him to win, and Chicago's playoff hopes were not at stake.

    Unless McCown completely blows it in Minnesota this Sunday, he's probably our backup next year. Let's hope he does blow it, or he utterly destroys the Vikings. Another mediocre performance against another awful pass defense isn't good enough, but it'll probably be good enough for the front office.

  • In reply to Crunch Buttsteak:

    I reserve judgment on McCown being back until after the Vikes game. He's OLD, and it's a long stretch to say he played his way back into the NFL on that game.

  • But the Vikings are near last in pass defense. They have nothing to play for, and there will be no real pressure on McCown. He's really going to have to light them up to impress, imo.

  • He's 33 in July. And while the jury's definitely still out he displayed
    good pocket prescence and didn't try to do too much. When something wasn't there, he tucked it and ran. He kept the Bears in the hunt Sunday and the defense didn't take advantage of that fact.

  • In reply to Albertintucson:

    The Bears were in the hunt vs Oakland, KC, Denver, and (for a while) Seattle. All of those teams are better against the pass than Green Bay. Green Bay's saving grace is their ability to pick the ball off, but fortunately for McCown, they muffed a couple.

  • In reply to Crunch Buttsteak:

    we need a real 'franchise' back up in chicago.

    I wanted bulger badly last year. Now he's retired. I wanted kyle badly this year... think about if we'd have landed him this year. Shit, we'd probably be the 5th seed.

    Anyway, we just need someone good. neckbeard will probably be challending cassel for the start. I'll look for a list of availables somewhere.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    Orton will probably be a starter, if not in KC, somewhere.
    Hopefully Cutler will be better protected next year. He can hook slide, hit the dirt at the first sign of a sack, and stand around like a big puss in turnover situations, I don't care. Even a single missed possession in a crucial game can kill you, so the Bears better not be too satisfied with McCown (until he really proves himself).

  • I think part of Jeff's hatin' on Mully is valid.

    Mully is, from my observations, a bit of a drunk. He always seems a little fried at the edges, even during his radio show. I don't know how many brain cells he still has chained together anymore.

  • great another reason for "Glitchy" to bring him back:

    http://bleacherreport.com/articles/999652-5-most-worthless-players-in-the-nfl

    to keep another experiment alive.

  • In reply to lobotobear:

    Whatcha talkin bout lobo. I was pulling for Jerra to sign all 5 of those jokers. Booya!

  • In reply to TracDaddy:

    bbbbbbbbbbwwwwwwwwwwwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaa.

  • In reply to lobotobear:

    hilarious... I clicked the link and on the page, that fucking gay aaron rodgers commercial comes on with his big mug right there.

    I know, doens't make any sense, but it was funny.

  • as for the PB..I likey blogfader...I don't even think a game needs to be played, just an award from that panel...... simple.

  • Dammit, so I still have to root for Washington to win on Sunday, to prevent the possibility of our NFC East road game being in Dallas.
    F-cking A, it is difficult to get to a road game now.

  • I'd much rather see an "All Rookie Bowl".

  • Why not do a Scrub Bowl? All the teams could pick an offensive and defensive player from their third or second string. The guys that kickass in practice and work ethic, but just can't seem to get playing time. Give them a chance to see some full speed action, while letting other teams scout the under-talent. Hell, you could even do this the bye-week before the SuperBowl.

  • I will say that frozen Lou's is the only real choice in Chicago for distance shipping. I just can't get with Gino's anymore since it was sold, and if you don't know - Lou Malnatti started Uno's and Due's and sold it to a conglomerate (who ruined it), and turned right back around and competed against them and blew them away (although Due's was sold again, and is now back to the original pie recipe and is pretty good.)

    Giordano's and Edwardos both suck next to Lou. Giordano's just sucks period. Everything else is neighborhood mom and pop, and varies widely.

    If you come to Chitown and want authentic square baked slices, head to Pompei in Little Italy

    http://www.pompeipizza.com/

    We even have New Haven style here (not really a fan):
    http://www.piecechicago.com/pizza/index.html

  • Next to Lou's, Piece is my favorite pizza in chicago and they brew their own beer in-house.

  • In reply to Waffle 2.0:

    that's not true:

    1. Lou's
    2. Pizano's http://www.pizanoschicago.com/about.php - run by Rudy Malnati Jr - think Lou's flavor with a thinner crust. fucking awesome.
    3. Piece

  • In reply to Waffle 2.0:

    Yes, I should have mentioned that the whole Malnati family thing is one of Chicago's great soap operas. The matron of Malnati, Donna Marie Malnati, who is Rudy's widow, decided to take on "the family" and do Pizano's.

    Many stories in Chi town, and lots of pizza to choose from. For shipping out of state, however, only Lou really has that down.

  • yup

  • rumor has it that when a young man was in college he would purchase the frozen pizzas for a certain amount and then take them up to school and sell them for 3 to 4 times face value. pizza scalping became all the rage at the dorm. the young man couldn't spend that money fast enough on mushrooms, weed, ramen noodles and 22oz bottles of budweiser.

  • In reply to Waffle 2.0:

    johnny... why you bug out last night maing? Was fun.

    GP, get in on this man. Johnny, shady and I lighting each other up. I invite MBP but he never responds. *sniff*

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    I know - I have to buy the game first...I rented it awhile back and played through a big chunk of the campaign (I assume we are talking MW3, right?)...

  • In reply to MikeBrownhadaPosse:

    beware MBHP,

    if you see a guy running around the board with his nose absolutely buried in what looks to be a great novel, it's just MB staring the fuck out of his hearbeat sensor as i stalk him like a jungle cat stalks a couple from cleveland that got separated from the safari group.

  • In reply to Waffle 2.0:

    sheeeeeit.

    MBP, that's called.... 'I joined the game and got smoked so many times in a row I didn't know whch way was up. I'm still a noob and have to get my bearings still so I ony get smoked 3/4ths of the time.'

    As my high school coach used to tell us, excuses are like assholes gentlemen, everyone's got one... and they all stink.

    Hey johnny, how did you like that minigun welcome I gave you and shady in that last game? HooAAHHH!

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    wife gave me the look.

    MB, i have to address this now because i can't type on that shitty interface on PS3.

    The 3 of us need to get into a group and then jump on a real team deathmatch. the boards are big enough where it doesn't become a john woo movie...unless you want it to.

    The 3 of us could flank dudes and light it up. The games you guys play now just don't have enough zip for me. the boards are too big for 2 or 3 guys to duke it out.

  • In reply to Waffle 2.0:

    Holy shit. I might just buy a Ps3 and MW3 for shits and giggles

  • In reply to Artoo:

    if you do it you're career will take a sudden downturn but it's absolutely correctable. Just don't let it get in the way of you bathing, making money or making sweet sexy time and you'll be fine.

  • In reply to Waffle 2.0:

    your

  • In reply to Waffle 2.0:

    dude, I can't stand those fucking things. I saw you in one of those maings. Getting lit up by a bunch of fucking 14 year olds on fake weed and no dos like I light you up?

    It's a nightmare man. Hate it. That's why I do the 1:1 thing. If we can get 3-4 more guys from the blog in our own room, we can do teams, etc...

    Fuck that teenage angst-fest. not into it.

  • One of the best frozen pizzas around is Vito and Nick's.....hard to find, but freakin awesome stuff.

  • I'm interested in the playoffs. Sign me up Blogfather.

  • "PLAYOFFS?! FANTASY PLAYOFFS?!"

    Of COURSE I'm interested, Blogfather.

  • In reply to Albertintucson:

    he he

  • I still don't understand why the owners allow the Pro Bowl Game to be played, even at half speed. It's just another huge opportunity to get someone hurt.

    The best way to fix it is to kill it.

    Pick the teams and forget about the game.

  • I'm in on the fantasy playoffs.

  • Totally agree with ya, Al. I remember Wally Chambers getting hurt in the Pro Bowl and he was never the same. He was one of my favorite players.

    Jeff, I have no idea how to play fantasy football but if you're desperate for players count me in. I'm not sure but I'm guessing that if by some miracle I won, sending pizzas to Canada could be more difficult than you think. If you find out it's a pain in the ass, let me know and I won't play. Won't hurt my feelings either way.

  • In reply to CanadaBear:

    And how about that excellent Patriots' running back (Robert Brown???) who blew his knee out in the sand football game and was basically never heard frm again.\

    Wally Chambers. Vastly Underrated greatness when he was healthy.
    As I recall the Bears stuck Tampa with him in exchange for a #1.

  • Speaking of playoffs Jeff, what have you cooked up to guard against my weekend picks sandbagging ways?

  • In reply to TracDaddy:

    http://tinyurl.com/br5esor

  • Is that me or Jeff? lol

  • In reply to TracDaddy:

    I dunno, I just needed an excuse to post that pic.

  • Fantasy Playoffs? Count me in. This is going to happen. We are going to get a legit Wideout and draft defensive players if they are there. Jerry doesn't believe in drafting a Wideout in the first round.

  • I sent an email, count me in as well, please.

  • To all you boys around the country:
    http://www.tastesofchicago.com/?utm_campaign=Ship-it!&utm_source=loushome&utm_medium=Homepage

    to all you Chicago Boys:
    http://www.pizanoschicago.com/about.php -- try it and love it

    To MB:
    stop hiding behind your heartbeat sensor and meet me on the field of battle with just pistols and maybe a grenade or two.

  • In reply to Waffle 2.0:

    Hahahahaha... stop crying. You'll get used to it and won't get lit up as much.

    Next time we play we can set up pistol or shotgun or grenade match. Last time shady and I played the motherfucker says, "dude, shotgun match" so we both get shotguns and the first time the jackass sees me, he lights me up with a fucking heavy machinegun. asshole.

    btw, I fucking love that heartbeat sensor. Boo yah!

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    Why does our differences in consoles stop us from playing that "me kicking your ass" MW3

  • In reply to Artoo:

    hahahha... like romeo and juliet erik.... so sad.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    you bastard, did you like my Matrix jump out of the window while i turned to try to keel you?

    I died on the fall but it looked pretty.

  • In reply to Waffle 2.0:

    hahahahaha... yeah. was pretty.

    Go get thee a blue tooth on your way home tonight please. Best buy has em cheap. Might as well get the full experience:

    http://www.bestbuy.com/site/searchpage.jsp?_dyncharset=ISO-8859-1&_dynSessConf=5443885547908057290&id=pcat17071&type=page&st=turtlle+beach&sc=Global&cp=1&nrp=15&sp=&qp=&list=n&iht=y&usc=All+Categories&ks=960

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    Dude, are you guys seriously gonna make me buy MW3 so I can go all Saving Private Ryan on yo asses!?

    http://youtu.be/frnezwwkpbU

  • DOOOOO EEEEET!!!

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    ha ha, i have a blue tooth, it just doesn't register for some reason so i need to do some interwebs research then i will jump on and all of us will jump into a real team deathmatch and keeel some sons of bitches.

  • Pretty fucking funny: #worldfullofspoiledfuckingbrats

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CwwWqRV2RsI

  • Adam Carolla on ass-douches.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJD8pZiRIzs

  • count me in in the fantasy postseason game.

  • In reply to FQD1911:

    FQ sighting!!!

  • We used to act holier than thou, and say "at least were not the Bungles"

    Well, the Bungles are in the playoffs. The Bungles found Andy Dalton after the showdown with Palmer, a showdown that netted them some of Oakland's picks, so that turned out to be well played.

    There are becoming fewer and fewer teams that we can say "at least were not THOSE guys." One of them is the Rams, who are just about to can Spagno-lo-compadre and that front office is a giant motherfucking clusterfuck. The Jags Wayne Weaver the Deceiver is a giant douche so I really hope Taub doesn't go there, but outside of this, there are few teams as inept as the Bears over the last few years. Had we stayed healthy, and gone into the playoffs, maybe this is a non-story, but right now all the press wants to talk about is "why the fuck did the Bears have five, count them five, URFAs? Because that's insane."

    And I agree.

  • At least we're not the:

    Colts - We played a lot worse without our QB, but at least we're a "defense minded team" whatever that means.

    Jags, Dolphins - You think our back office is bad?

    Redskins - Nice to have solved the QB issue for now.

    Vikings - Soldier field might have lousy turf, but at least we know we're allowed to come back next year.

  • In reply to NewBearInTown:

    True.

    And Cinci is still a rathole, shit town apt to bribe its fans

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/redskins/cincinnati-bengals-announce-home-sellout-sunday-for-big-game-with-ravens-2nd-this-season/2011/12/28/gIQA10vdMP_story.html

  • In reply to NewBearInTown:

    here's a scary question for you... what would our record have been if we'd have lost jay for the year in the last preseason game?

    Holy shit... we would have won more than two games, but still a VERY scary thought.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    we would've surely landed orton had that happened. no way the chiefs would've had a worse record.

  • We can always say, "At least we're not the (insert year here) Bears."
    "You think they were bad, you shoulda seen the (insert year here) Bears."

    Then we can argue about which team was worse...

  • silly.. well, I guess its better than obese people: http://uncrate.com/stuff/steelcase-walkstations/

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    Bacon soda? Yessssss, my preciousssss.... we likes it....

    http://uncrate.com/stuff/bacon-soda/

  • delicious!

  • I have been mostly subjected to posting on my phone. Thus, where in the hell did all these little aka names come from?

  • In reply to Artoo:

    MST3K

  • What the hell?

  • In reply to Artoo:

    http://incompetech.com/gallimaufry/mstnames.html

  • wow

  • In reply to Artoo:

    Did MB claim Big McLargeHuge?

  • In reply to Artoo:

    Doc suggested we all take a nickname from the list, which I thought was a cute idea (awwww), alas, I've always been old skool in the thought that nicknames can't ever be taken, they can only be given (see animal house).

    Thus, I don't prescribe (or subscribe for that matter). If I were, I would have claimed Big McLarge Huge (it just rooooles off the tongue), but since I don't... I can think of no other poster it would fit better Erik. Please feel free to take it, and thanks for asking first.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    btw, whomever takes "Bob Johnson" will be my cyber-hero.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    Lmao I like mine. I figured it would fit you or crown.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    you don't need to scuttle "Artoo" you just add it as an, "(AKA XXXXX)"

  • Speaking of St. Louis, this year they upped the ante:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PLi8g9Yv7sk&feature=related

  • Before Forte got hurt, Barber was just what we needed. If bell is like Forte then he will suffer at scoring and picking up 3rd and short. Barber doesn't need to be our starting running back but he is the compliment for Forte. Hell, before Forte went down..guess who had more rushing touchdowns? Object, he also missed two or three games. BARBARIAN. The name should have told you he would make a bonehead mistake.

  • In reply to Artoo:

    Not object , meant btw.

  • In reply to Artoo:

    Bell and Forte would be good together in the backfield though. Both are good receivers.

  • In reply to Crunch Buttsteak:

    Unless Bell can pick up 3rd and short or in goaline td. Idc how good receiving they are.

  • In reply to Artoo:

    No, I agree with you about the need for a short yardage back. Just sayin, we also need all the receivers we can get.

  • I have no clue how to play fantasy football, but I have to try to win that pizza. Count me in.

    The last time I had Chicago pizza it was 197something, at a place called the Golden Crust.

    I miss it, but what miss most of all are Gyros. Where I live, they call them Jy-roes, and they are usually made of beef, or beef and lamb steak-ums.

  • In reply to Crunch Buttsteak:

    mmmmmm... steakums!

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    Steak-ums, with some kind of cucumberless white sauce, on a tiny pita, for $6.00. I don't think there's a Greek within a hundred miles of here.

  • In reply to Crunch Buttsteak:

    hahahaha... where's 'here' buttsteak?

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    I'm on the border of PA and West Virginia, in the foothills of the Appalachians, near the Monongahela river. I can't give you a town-name, there is none.

  • In reply to Crunch Buttsteak:

    weeeeel sssuuuuuuuuuweeeee! You got a purdy mouth boyah!

    Do you make good moonshine?

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    You're behind the times. It's all meth labs now. Didn't you see "Winter's Bone"? It's like a modern Deliverance from the point of view of Ned Beatty's pals. Well not really, but it's closer to the reality around here these days.

  • In reply to Crunch Buttsteak:

    meth is the new moonshine buttsteak

  • In reply to Crunch Buttsteak:

    I had a so-called gyro in South Carolina recently at a so-called Greek restaurant. It was uneatable. Microwaved lamb(?) with tons of lettuce on a tiny pita and some sauce that was more like a shitty white coleslaw. Had some lasagna a different night that tasted nothing like lasagna.

  • In reply to TheFifth:

    nothing better than a couple bottles of Roditis, tons of authentic greek food and partying in greek town on halsted. i love chicago but the weathers sucks balls.

  • fb_avatar

    Count me in Blog Father!

  • In reply to Shannon Pankster:

    ok shannon. thanks.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    You da blog fadder MB?

  • In reply to #76 Mongo Murph:

    oh shit. whoops

  • The coach hasn't made an appearance in a while.... maybe this will draw him out: http://thechart.blogs.cnn.com/2011/12/28/la-could-vote-on-mandatory-condom-use-in-adult-films/?hpt=hp_t2

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    MB that would make for some pretty lame porn. This too

    http://thechart.blogs.cnn.com/2011/12/28/la-could-vote-on-mandatory-cuddling after effortless missionary-and worrying about if the laundry was changed instead of blowjobs like when we dated-in-adult-films/?hpt=hp_t2

  • In reply to Waffle 2.0:

    hee hee

  • In reply to Waffle 2.0:

    I clicked that.

    http://brucrew.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/facepalm-bear.jpg

  • not to make fun cause this sucks, but this sounds like the right program for us!

    http://www.cnn.com/video/?hpt=hp_t2#/video/bestoftv/2011/12/28/cohen-forced-sterilization-in-america.cnn

    Holy shit... watching the rest of this... you could be sterilized for being not attractive?!?!?! Jesus, that's crazy.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    I meant for Doc and me.

  • The best essay on Tebus comes from, unsurprisingly, Klostermann:

    http://www.grantland.com/story/_/id/7319858/the-people-hate-tim-tebow

  • In reply to gpldan:

    Good find GP, was an excellent read, thanks.

  • Jeff, I emailed you to get into the playoff picks, but just in case, count me in!!

  • I'm in Jeff.

  • In reply to TheFifth:

    ok guys thanks

  • Yeah, count me in too, Jeff.

    I thought that it was only for present day Chicagoans, and since I currently live in L.A., assumed I was out.

    But if they're gonna mail them out, I'm in.

    I'm about to own Trac in the FF Bears Blog II Bowl, barring a complete meltdown, and would love some good pizza for the post season.

  • I normally listen to Mully in the morning. He's not the best writer, but he's not bad on the radio. I think the point he was making was that just because our starters are starting doesn't necessarily mean they should be. How many players has he drafted that are still in the NFL? Now compare that to other GMs in the league. Try to look at it statistically, and the draft record will speak for itself.

    Corey Graham definitely deserves it. Peppers, Urlacher and Peanut definitely deserve it. Lance Briggs didn't have his best year and probably made it more on reputation, but he's probably playing hurt. An all star game in the NFL have proven to suck for the most part providing little entertainment to fans. But players love the perks involved and it could be a bargaining chip in contract negotiations between teams and Rosenhouses.

    And regarding fresh Lou Malnati's pizza yes my friend the best in Chicago. I'm sorry NY but in da Chi we eat our pizza like it's a meal not a snack my friend. You can certainly count me in for the pizza contest if I'm not going to win a fucking birdhouse. Kind of wanted the photo and crispies though.

  • In reply to Shady:

    Sorry for the grammar fart I left in there.

  • In reply to Shady:

    shady, did you see johnny up there whining about getting the noob Ben Dover treatment? Johnny, I expected more from you son. Getting repeatedly smoked is kind of rite of passage. Welcome my man.

    And shady, the next time you call for a shotgun battle… I'm bringing my fucking M60 with rapid-fire punk.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    i've developed a strategy. i will fucking keeeel you. now

  • In reply to Shady:

    Devil's advocate:

    How many GM's can claim to have more than 1 QB they drafted wind up starting (not as a result of injury) this season for other teams? Jerry has two, Rex and Neckbeard.

    Other guys he drafted that went on to play for other teams, to name a few: A. Brown, N. Vasher, D. Manning, M. Anderson, T. Harris, C. Benson, C. Harris, G. Olsen, D. LeFefour, M. Columbo, Tank, J. Gilbert, Ian Scott, T. Metcalf, J. Iglesias (I admit this is a strech - he is on Houston's practice squad).

    Angelo could have done a lot better on draft days, but he has been a flat out beast with respect to free agency/trades. I go so far as to say that I can not think of one GM that has gotten more out of FA/trades than Jerry has.

    Anti-Jerry guys are quick to point to Arch Delux, Manu, J. Quinn/T. Collins (I blame Terry Shea/M. Martz for these decisions bye the way) and Orlando Pace, and never give him credit for John Tait, Rueben Brown, Fred Miller, Thomas Jones, Mushin Muhammed, Robbie Gould, Wale Ogunlye, Brendan Ayenbadejo, Julius Peppers, and Jay Cutler. We did not lose as many games because of the misses (safe to say Arch delux probably whiffed on a tackle that cost us a game or two), but we won a shitload of games because of the hits...

  • In reply to Viva:

    I just want to see the numbers so we have a point of reference and can make comparisons to GMs and organizations who have had consistent success.

  • In reply to Shady:

    Ditto.
    Who feels like doing the research?

  • In reply to Viva:

    if you want to give him credit for signing jones, you should also punch him right in the dick for getting rid of thomas jones.

  • Regarding the Fantasy playoffs - I sent an email but nothing wrong with a little redundancy.

    I missed the Pro Bowl/All-Star discussion but I remember as a kid, the Bears used to play a college all-star team every year for charity. I'm pretty sure I know why that went away.

    I also missed the pizza discussion but there are a couple decent local pies in the West Palm Beach, FL area. However, I was spoiled - I lived literally next door to Pizano's (1050 N State) for a number of years before moving down here in 2002...

  • In reply to tobijohn:

    Actually, that was 850 North State not 1050. I lived there too (Newberry Plaza) years before that. Actually locked myself out of my apartment on the 51st floor there naked one night. A pretty story, I'll post it this off-season when things get slow....

  • In reply to tobijohn:

    no pictures please.

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    Unless you put it in your avatar - they're so fucking small and fuzzy, no one is going to know what the hell it is anyway.

  • In reply to MikeBrownhadaPosse:

    And to reiterate, I'm referring to the avatar pics...not your testicles. I have no idea what they look like and I'd like to keep it that way.

  • In reply to MikeBrownhadaPosse:

    LOL....

  • In reply to MikeBrownhadaPosse:

    small and fuzzy.... BAAAAHAHAHAHAHHAahaha.

    That made me laugh out loud maing.

  • not sure..did anyone post this yet?

    http://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2011/12/28/dont-ask-lovie-smith-about-mike-martz/

    oh btw...hey were all set!

  • In reply to lobotobear:

    did you read the comments by all the packer fans lobo?

    They all to a number, are wishing and hoping and begging us to keep jerry (and lovie). Fuck man.

  • I just stumbled onto something that is out of the ordinary. I saw a picture of some Patriots offensive players standing around and they were all white. I found it a little odd. I went to their depth chart and Ill be danged but there are 8 starters on offense that are white and only 3 black. Be like 3 or 4 white guys starting on an NBA team.

  • In reply to #76 Mongo Murph:

    Really?

  • In reply to #76 Mongo Murph:

    Boston.

  • In reply to #76 Mongo Murph:

    fucking racists (just kidding murph)

  • In reply to MB30SD:

    Oh I know your kidding, you can call me a lot of shit but never that one.

  • In reply to #76 Mongo Murph:

    I meant the patriots not you murph!

  • We were recently referring to Houston as the bar for comparison to our season after we lost Cutler, they lost Schaub, etc...
    Suffice to say, if Houston loses again this weekend, then I think their wheels can be considered to be off and rolling down the road too.
    You don't lose your franchise QB, RB, multiple pieces of the OL, and your deep-threat receiver (the fact that he's the only one on our roster is a fair criticism of Angelo) without paying the piper sooner or later.

  • Regarding the ongoing draft grades discussion, check this out:

    http://coldhardfootballfacts.com/Articles/11_3749_Decade_in_the_making%3A_the_ultimate_NFL_draft_grades.html

  • In reply to tobijohn:

    Tank Johnson?!?

  • In reply to DYLbear23:

    I know, I know. Another thug run out of town but weren't his Bears and post Bears stats at least respectable? Compared to what, of course...

  • In reply to tobijohn:

    Whiffing on 1st round picks hurts more than finding late round gems helps.

  • In reply to Shady:

    look at you... fresh off kicking my ass. when do you sleep maing?

  • In reply to tobijohn:

    great find... B-

    I wish

  • In reply to tobijohn:

    If my children bring home an overall grade of B- from school, I'm conflicted. Hanging around the cellar of "good" can be a frustrating situation, specially if they pissed away straight A's by not applying themselves. But, if they were incapable of bringing home a better grade and did apply themselves, I would be both disappointed and understanding of the matter.

    Therein lies your torment MB. Your failure to recognize Jerra is incapable of a better performance has robbed you of the ability to temper your disappointment with understanding. Your frustration is misplaced due to the fact that Jerra can't do any better and you must reconcile this in order to find inner peace. You must love Jerra for who he is.

  • In reply to TracDaddy:

    If there's a God out there I just pray for a Center, a Mike, Brandon Marshall and some good luck next year. Hate weighs heavy on a heart, so Angelo can just go and meditate on what he's done to us. There's always next year (although maybe not after this year?) ...

    Just catching up now ..... went back to the auld sod for christmas with the twins and missus. Two long haul flights is just a dream situation and I can't wait for the ones back. Catching the vomiting and diarrahea bug was a bonus - it's been a blast ... out both ends. Didn't even get to see the Packers game, first time that's happened in years!

    Outside of the football I hope everybody had some nice time-out with their loved ones (and did I see Doc has had his twelfth kid? Congrats Doc).

    I can't wait til next season. Again.

  • Is Doc Mormon?

  • In reply to Artoo:

    Doc just likes to change diapers.

  • In reply to Artoo:

    The Duggars are not Mormons. C'mon Artoo.

  • Off subject~ Is there a link to Weber's post game presser out in internet land? I have the hardest time finding Illini coverage.

  • In reply to EnderWiggin:

    Are you looking for the post-Minnesota one? I'm sure they'll post it to fightingillini.com sooner or later. There's a lag time...

  • new tread gents

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