This post is part of the Social Butterfly Mom's series "Validate Thy Neighbor," in which two bloggers choose a topic and write in support of the OPPOSITE of what they practice. Today, Lipsticks and Lollipops, a mom, and I, a dad, explore the potential roles of our counter-parts.
I think after taking our first vacation I learned mostly that you only get through all aspects of child rearing as a great team. Honestly, we have been round and round about who does what, and this only makes us both feel less sufficient. We both work full time and feel like we do more than the other.
On our first vacation I told my wife this: “Look, we both do a LOT!” That’s the only way this thing works. Sometimes she forgets how many shitty diapers I change. Sometimes I forget how many bubble baths she draws. So I get to wipe Abby’s butt and she gets to wash her with bubbles. Oh well (sigh).
On the way to the airport Abby threw up all over her Sunday’s best. We quickly pulled into the McDonald’s, and went to work in the freezing cold. Jen started changing her clothes; I began cleaning every fiber of the car and car seat. At this point, it’s more about getting the job done. We had to catch a flight. We couldn’t start debating about whose turn it was to change her. Team work was the only way to get through this catastrophe in time.
Let me go a step further and say that a mother’s work is never done. My wife works 8-6pm, and as soon as she walks in the door, Abby loses her mind if mommy won’t hug her. So mommy rushes to wash her hands, and give Abby that validation she desperately needs. At the end of the day, she is still a mom, and has to be when the suit comes off. There is no time to relax. After working a full day, she usually makes us dinner and gives Abby a bath. Sometimes they come out to say good night, and sometimes I find them both passed out in bed. When I find them both passed out cold, I smile at how darling they look, and realize how much sacrifice she makes as well. It takes a village, but in this town there is only three.
Please contact the Social Butterfly Mom if you are a blogger and would like to participate in #validatethyneighbor at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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