1 day, 18 innings, 0 runs. One loss at the hand of a former object of Cubs fans' desire, two at the hands of, well, a former object of Cubs fans' desire. Those would be Masahiro Tanaka and Joe Girardi for those keeping score at home.
The Cubs grunted, bunted, and punted their way to a disappointing day in the Bronx. Seriously, of the Cubs trio of hits in Game 1, two came by way of the bunt. When I said I wanted the Cubs to do a better job of manufacturing runs, I didn't mean that they should go back to pre-Industrial Revolution methods. This is like watching the Amish play baseball.
I can't find an exact stat for bunt attempts, and I'd probably be even more incensed if I could, but the box scores show at least 4 that were put in play. That's not a big enough total to fit with my irrational anger though; surely there were another 50-60 failed lay-downs. We all knew the team wasn't going to be good, but c'mon...
Pardon me for being a little salty, but it's an inevitable byproduct of all the extra seasoning needed to eat crow. But hey, at least I got to follow it up with a big slice of bunt cake. Too much? Yeah, that's what I thought.
My feelings are best summed up in the eloquently succinct word of Starlin Castro, who, following a pop-up to open the 9th inning of Game 2, exclaimed: well, I don't really want to type it out, but it rhymes with suck and duck.
Sounds like Starlin's English is getting better.
— Evan Altman (@DEvanAltman) April 17, 2014
But hey, we only have to wait 32 days to exact revenge, right? That's because the Derek Jeter Retirement World Tour will play a couple dates in Chicago beginning May 20th. It's sad to say, but I think more Cubs fans might show up to the ballpark to see The National, or even a reunion of Tommy Shaw, Jack Blades, Ted Nugent, and Michael Cartellone, than their own team by that point.
So give The Captain a case of Old Style or a custom Clark the Cub suit or, hell, let him call his shot in a game for all I care. Just beat the damn Yankees.
Follow me on Twitter: @DEvanAltman
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