It was another Red Line ride on Cubs game day, heading south toward Addison. Two suburban trixies and three meathead grad students were sitting at the end of the car opposite the Hobo Corner, having a loud, animated discussion about whether they were conservative or liberal. One woman flipped her long, blonde hair and declared: "Like, I'm socially liberal, but economically conservative, you know?"
At Berwyn, three high school girls and a huge, 6-foot-5 guy boarded. The guy sported nicely applied eyeliner and nail polish. His hair cascaded down to his waist. They walked quickly to the emergency doors to cross between cars. As he started to open the emergency door, one of the suburban trixies grabbed the handle of the door. In a loud voice she announced, "Ummm, that says emergency exit for a reason, you know. This is like, really stupid. And, you know, really dangerous. So, could you like, stop it?!?"
The tall high-schooler turned and stared in disbelief. With his hand on hip, he expertly flipped back his own beautiful long hair. And in his best imitation of a suburban trixie, he screamed, "OMIGAWD!!"
Then he bounced through the emergency exit with his little posse of girls.