CTA Tattler

The bus has an interlock system that will not allow the bus to move while the rear door is open, in other words, you are a liar. The driver did not take off while you were still stepping off the bus.

I've seen a lot of grooming on board that should have been done at home, but until Friday afternoon I had never seen this. NB Lincoln bus, about 3 in the afternoon. A 60ish looking man pulled out a stick of deodorant, unbuttoned the top two or three buttons on his shirt, pulled up his T shirt and applied the deodorant to his armpits.

This happened many years ago, but I think the story is still worth telling...

Gawd, this has to be around the late summer/early fall of 1983 (I think). It was a Saturday night, and the 8 Halsted had just picked up a good number of passengers from the Englewood Station and at 63rd Street. It was one of the older raggedy green and white GM buses with the cushioned green seats that was long before the days of air-conditioning. The bus was pretty somber as it headed north. People were just tired I guess and wanted to get to where they were going. One of the passengers had a boom box and turned it on. The music was a nice diversion and cut through the silence, so as the driver, I didn't say anything. By the time we got to Garfield Boulevard, the next song to cue up was the hip-hop version of "Lean On Me" (I can't recall who does that). The guy with the boom box turned it up a little, and one by one, people started to sing along. Soon, the entire bus was rocking with the chorus of the song. Hell, I was even singing! By the time we were at 47th Street, the song was over, the boom box quieted and the people on the bus were in a much better mood than they were a few blocks ago. Some people were in tears, but all were smiling, and sharing the moment with each other! It was contagious! They all shared in a moment. We all did! By the time the bus reached Roosevelt Road the moment had passed, and it was back to normalcy.

It's just one of many adventures that stick out in my mind from a long career at CTA.

I wasn't on a bus or train, but I was at a bus stop when this happened:

Late June/July of last year I was at the corner of Broadway and Lawrence waiting for a bus to head down to the Blue Line. This obviously out of it lady comes walking up the street. I was leaning against the wall and had just put my cell phone away and there was a guy and a gal standing at the curb. The "Crazy Lady" walks over to the pair and mumbles some stuff to the gal and starts to walk off, but then turns around and goes back to mumble some more stuff, about the only thing we understood was "Stick it where the sun don't shine". The "Crazy Lady" then walked over to me, leaned in as if to say something, and instead of saying anything cocked back her leg and jabbed her knee into my groin. The "man reflex" of twisting kicked in to dodge most of the blow. But she was gone before I could really grasp what happened. The pair at the curb asked me if I was ok and it was quite the topic, along with other things about Uptown for the few blocks they were on.

Friday afternoon, a NB Western bus (for a change). I''m

Sorry about that. Anyway, Friday PM, Western bus. I'm sitting across from the eixt. Guy behind me talking on his phone, sounding like he's in a Mamet play, telling whoever it is he's talking to exactly what he has coming to him. He is so loud the driver pulls over mid block and tells him to keep it clean and keep it down or get off the bus. Mr. Tough Talker turns out to be not so tough when confronted by a skinny CTA bus driver. He puts his phone away, apologizes, and is quiet for the rest of my ride.

I've been riding the Orange line to and from work for about 4 years now, so I've grown accustomed to most of the grooming that riders (overwhelmingly females) do on the train - applying makeup, curling eyelashes, etc). However, I was appalled by what I saw last week.

I was sitting in a rear-facing seat and a young woman sat down in the center-facing seat that was directly in front of me. After a few minutes, she removes a compact from her purse, opens it so that she could use the mirror, removes a pair of tweezers from her purse, and proceeds to remove every rogue hair on her face and neck - then proceeds to pluck her eyebrows. Each hair she removed was carefully placed into the compact. She continued this from Roosevelt all the way to Pulaski.

That is so gross I have seen women do the same thing, even plucking upper lip hairs, in public youd think they would save that stuff for when they get home. why was she saving the hairs uhhgh

"Overheard on the #66 Chicago"

(Spoken to no one in particular, without preamble, and appropos of nothing)

Cuz when a man walk into Burger King,
a woman treat him like a king.
Then another man walk in, and....
well, it don't do for men to be fighting over a woman.

I had me a Phillippine woman once.
She had her two black men on the side.

That's why I go to Mcdonalds.

(Exeunt. Out of the bus, and into a nearby McDonalds)

SB Red Line just past rush hour. Man in his 30s taking up two seats, he's on the outside seat with his briefcase on the window seat. Older (than him anyway) woman standing just a little too close for his comfort, with her purse and a shopping bag swinging in his face. The bag hits him as we go around a curve and he asks her to stand back a little. She refuses, says if he lets her sit down, then there's no problem. He refuses. She inches closer, he gets hit again. Disgusted, he gets up and stands by the door. She sits, in the window seat, leaving the aisle seat for anyone who wants it.

ah.. was on the way home from class, so i caught the #18 just in time. i was getting comfortable in my seat, & looked around at the other passengers. i'm sure everyone else noticed the girl who was chatting away on her phone. HACKKKK...TUH! (i thought to my self, this idiot spit on the bus!) so i turned around and gave her a nasty look! she was surprised that someone noticed it, because her eyes were as wide as dinner plates, and she stared right back at me. she continued blabbing on the phone with her friend, and even made it clear enough for me to hear "if this bitch turn around and look at me again..." ok, she was just mad that i caught her being a pig. before i got off the bus, i let the driver know. when i started to walk home, i was being paranoid and i wanted to make sure she didn't follow me. i continued to do this side-stepping crab walk down the block.. i'll never sit in the seat right before the rear doors ever again.

yesterday on the CTA #55 to Midway, just before the western stop, two, well, kids really, got on through the rear door of the bus. One walked up to were I was seated and said something to me. I ignored him and then he reached out his hand trying to put his hand in my pocket. I grabbed his arm and he had the audacity to ask me "WTF are you doing? gimme the ipod" as if he had a right to it. I didnt let him go and said no to his request. He struggled and the other guy ran up and punched me in the face, causing no real damage but a rather bad nose bleed. i let the other go and they both ran off the bus. The whole time, no one said or did anything, and the bus driver just watched as they got on, through the rear door mind you, and ran off.. afterwards, the other passengers seemed more worried about getting home than asking if i was okay. One did offer me a tissue, but i was bleeding ALOT... they all got on the next bus and left, and the bus driver stayed with me till the police arrived, but she called her supervisor first, NOT the police???

You should have done more than just grab their arm. How could nobody on the bus have helped you?

Everytime I go to the Jackson stop, there are so-called "performers" doing incredibly *bleep* music, be it rap or the twangy douchebag type of guitar playing. Or a woman sitting lazily on a bench singing. I would like to wait for the train peacefully, I can hear the last woman through my headphones! They all have those performer permits. I honestly have considered writing on a piece of paper "You suck" and putting it in their guitar case. I will not, not ever give money to a panhandler crossing from train car to train car, nor one of those "performers". It's obnoxious. One Sunday there was an awful racket coming from the tunnel to the Blue Line, it sounded like an animal was being murdered along with some looped bass beats. This practice needs to stop.

I read stories like this, and I swear...my Democratic Party-voting, liberal heart becomes more hardened every day to the point that I consider purchasing pepper spray or wishing Illinois had a conceal and carry law.

Except my friends would joke that I'd be the first to misuse the law to include random shootings of bus boys clearing plates before I've finished them.

They need to do something about panhandlers parking themselves outside CTA stations. I live near the Lawrence Line and there's always at least one guy, grinning like a loon, rocking on his heels ready to harass anybody coming off the train. Only the thought of jail kept me from punching him in the face after the 8th time he invaded my personal space. The station agent does *bleep*ing nothing about it.

And how do they decide who gets the prime begging spot? Arm wrestling? Peener length?

Noclevername: I've heard cops says at CAPS meeting that it is not against the law to ask someone for money -- as long as it's not aggressive panhandling.

If you are in fear for your safety by the aggressive panhandling, then you can sign a criminal complaint against the panhandler for what's called simple assault. But you have to sign the complaint and then appear in court.

I think I will, they often put their hands on me or get close enough to try and snatch my cellphone. Enough is enough.

The homeless are a MAJOR problem in Uptown, I often imagine the music to "Thriller" as they limp and stagger up and down Lawrence and Broadway.

If they put their hands on you, just deck 'em. Defending yourself will not result in arrest. Besides, who would the cops believe, you or some bum?

I got out of work last night, it was cold, there was a bus coming, so I got on it rather than walk to the train. I noticed (and appreciated) a fresh minty smell to the bus. Then I noticed the driver was flossing his teeth as he drove. He was using a flosser so he did have one hand on the wheel, and it's not texting, but it's still distracted driving. I got off at the next stop and walked to the train.

A few weeks ago, I was heading down on the Red Line from Howard to downtown, and along the way, a few people entered the car with LIVE snakes. Everyone made the comment "snakes on a train." (This was a Saturday evening, and it was 2 weeks ago. They weren't suspicious-acting, and thank goodness I'm not deathly afraid of snakes.

Sunday morning, on the way to work. I come out of the subway to find not the passing shower predicted, but a full out thunderstorm with drenching rain and a very close lightening strike. So instead of walking the 5 blocks, I wait it out in a bus shelter, complete with crazy person. He was literally foaming at the mouth. He explained to me in great detail the storm was St Peter looking for him because he had married St Peter's wife and now had to be punished for that. The bus came within 5 minutes. It was a Christmas bus. It had some female pop singer belting out "Do You Hear What I Hear" which I considered appropriate, having spent a little too much time with someone hearing voices I couldn't hear.

I think that guy was telling me he did a math equation and the word computer equaled 666 in his equation. Also he said that the government was putting computer chips in people to control them. I told him I used to have that job, it had great benefits but I got laid off. He got very frightened and went to the other side of the bus.

Hey Everyone - While about to exit the #50 Damen bus yesterday, in the front of the bus, right by the driver, no less, my cell phone (yeah, an iPhone) was stolen out of the back of my purse. The pickpocket used a very common ploy, which is why I'm sharing, so those of you who aren't familiar with this can be even more wary in these bad economic times: I was carrying a lot of bags, and he distracted me by telling me that something was falling out of one of them. I was wearing a shoulder bag, with a zipper in the main compartment, but an open pocket in the back. So, my guess is that he reached for whatever was easy to grab while he had me looking at the plastic shopping bag (of course there was nothing falling out), and came up with the phone, the only thing in there. So, riders beware. I have called the garage the bus came out of, and supposedly they're going to check the tapes of the cameras on the bus, but realistically, that is not going to get my phone back. I also put my e-mail address on the outside of the phone, so if he dumped it off and it's found, some honest person can reach me.

I managed to catch the Politeness Bus today. Which is much cooler than the Santa train, btw. Young people jumped up and offered their seats to everyone who looked to be over 50. I heard a lot of language I'm not used to on transit--phrases like 'excuse me' and 'thank you.' It was really strange.

THANK YOU SEAN NORTH SIDE YOU MADE ME LAUGH...THESE STORIES ARE GREAT!

Tuesday 06.01.10, about 09.45ish, I waited for the 81W bus at Cumberland & Catherine. I read the sign (bus drivers complain passengers don't read the sign) -- it said 81W (bus #544, one of the smaller buses). Upon boarding, the recorded message said "69 Cumberland". Why didn't the driver change the sign??
This happened 2 weeks ago at Cumberland & Catalpa when I waited for a 69 bus around noon. A bus (#530) went by with 81W on its sign. When it made the loop, I motioned to the driver to change the sign. He motioned that he couldn't. Then I mouthed "How was I supposed to know?" This incident I called CTA & complained (but didn't leave my name). Apparently it didn't do any good because it happened again. At least put a large cardboard sign in the window to let people know what bus number it is! Waiting 20-30 minutes for the next bus is ridiculous just because the driver doesn't have the proper sign displayed!
(The above was emailed to CTA. I wonder what BS reply they'll give!)

I received an email from CTA regarding this:

"Thank you for your complaint. We apologize for your poor travel experience. Your information has been forwarded to the responsible General Manager for corrective action. We have also alerted management to the signage malfunction.

"Again, we are sorry for the inconvenience, and we appreciate you taking the time to report this incident.

"CTA FEEDBACK TEAM"

LOL! Let's see IF anything gets done!

This may be the single worst eye-witness account of an accident, but I was just on that SB 148 that hit an SUV on Lake Shore Drive. The accident happened just about 9 AM maybe a quarter of a mile south of Belmont. I had a window seat, I was reading, I didn't notice anything until the woman next to me grabbed my arm to keep from falling into the aisle. Then bam! We hit the SUV. It's amazing the people standing in front of the yellow line didn't go through the windshield. Apparently the driver of the car swerved to miss something (somebody told me ducks, but I don't know) and that's when the bus hit him. The tail of the car was smashed in, the windshield of the bus was broken, and the front wheel of the bike that was in the carrier on the front of the bus is toast. We, the passengers, were on two other buses (another 148 and a 144) before the police arrived. Many passengers stopped to make sure our driver was okay and to commiserate with him before getting on the other buses. I even got to work on time.

OK, any time you ride the CTA, you might have the misfortune to see the lice lady or someone who is in fact talking to themselves. It goes with the territory. But my worst expierence with a commuting mission was with the Pace 332 bus. The Pace buses leave a lot to be desired, bad enough to make the CTA look good by comparison. But 2 days in a row I discovered that a Hispanic dared to tell me to "let the ladies on first" and I'm sure he knew that good seats on those Orion buses are very few. I guess he never got the memo that seats are not assigned like you find on planes with the boarding passes. Noting this idiot, I the same day bought a car. I'm glad I no longer work at the southernmost edge of the airport. Damn, do those Pace buses suck. I decided that those crappy bouncy seats were not worth going to jail over. Fresh approach to public transit? Try the CTA instead! Truth be told, I also use the CTA, for bar missions and as needed if the car isn't working. The CTA is a million times better than Pace.