AHS: Coven Review - The Sacred Taking

AHS: Coven Review - The Sacred Taking

Spoiler Alert: Do not read if you haven’t seen American Horror Story: Coven Season 3, Ep. 8 — “The Sacred Taking”.

“I’m starting to look less Samantha and more Endora every day.” — Fiona

I’ve given up. I can no longer try to decipher meaning or message from Coven*, especially when they come back with an episode that’s more fever dream than actual forward moving plot. Coven has fallen into a formula; forty-five minutes of highly stylized shots and underlining of previously stated ideas followed by ten minutes of utter fuckery.

Seriously, what is going on here? What did we really learn? Nothing. We still have no idea who the new supreme is (although at this point I’m hoping its Nan), this so called witchcraft/voodoo war has yet to rise about the cold level and all anyone did was remind us how terrible they are.

The longer these questions get strung out the less I care about the answers. Truthfully, I’ve seen no evidence that this coven should continue to exist. They kind of make a mess of everything they touch. Obviously the voodoo clan is no better. If they didn’t have each other to rail against who knows how they’d fill their days. Perhaps they could get around to being useful, decent human beings.

In a typical show an episode that featured a murder and resurrection, a woman being chopped up in a cage or even just a villain reinvigorating her vendetta to wreak havoc would be exciting if not monumental. So it’s really a testament to AHS’s brand that “The Sacred Taking” contained all that and more and still felt like little more wheel spinning.

Perhaps my annoyance is selfish. It’s difficult to write recaps about episodes that offer little new information and even less plot momentum.

So let’s turn our attention to the increasingly obvious point of this season: the epic diva showdown. Which of Ryan Murphy’s divas was the most divatastic this week? Even with the surprisingly low competition of a brutal amputation, giving your son an enema and surviving decapitation Fiona’s Little Edie death shroud would be the clear winner. In fact, I believe wrapping oneself in furs and a turban to commit suicide cements the title of Ultimate Diva for the rest of the series. But I withhold the right to change my mind barring any future fabulous behavior.

And its these divas, or more accurately the overall stellar cast, and the aforementioned forty-five minutes of highly stylized content that keeps me riveted to the screen even as I question a universe in which a woman can go from death’s door to fire starting sass in less than an hour. But take note Coven creators, there are only so many times you can throw a whole bunch of shit into a series and hope that people overlook the holes. Sooner or later everyone will get tired of the surface and notice there’s no substance.

*Obviously I have not really given up as I still have half a season of recaps to write. But perhaps I will stop being so annoyed when I fail to find anything.

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