How to change a flipping (literally) baby

There comes a time in child rearing when the baby learns to crawl, turn over and move every which way.

This is an exciting milestone to both the child and its family.

However, it is not an exciting milestone when it comes to diaper changing.

Then it is a nightmare. The child will not hold still. You scream in your head: “Hold the F still. Stop flipping moving! Don’t touch that!” The baby will flip over and try to crawl off of the diaper table.

If you are extra lucky they will have a poopie diaper. Then the baby will flip over into their own poop and a 5 minute diaper change turns into a 20 minute bath. Yay!

These are the things that have worked for me in order to get my 9 month old to stay still for about 20 seconds and then he loses interest:

  1. I give him a toy phone that plays music. As long as the phone is lighting up and playing music he will stay on his back. (Or if he is feeling feisty he will throw it on the floor- then flip over. ARGH!)
  2. I give him my work lanyard and he likes to chew on it.
  3. I give him the baby wipes and say “Hold this for me please.” When he realizes that he is being asked to be helpful, he then throws the the wipes on the floor.
  4. I pray to God and say the Serenity prayer.
  5. I give up, yell and just make sure the tabs are on the diaper and that his parts are covered. Then I get all angry when he gets his clothes wet 10 minutes later.

Ahhh, God bless the flipping baby!

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