Long story short: I'm half-heartedly apartment-hunting now, mostly checking out what rents are like now, deciding whether or not to move. I emailed this craigslist ad for a one bedroom coach house in Lincoln Park that was priced impossibly cheaply, asking for the cross streets. And the response I got was.... amazing:
From: Lovely Home <lovelyhome...@yahoo,com>
God bless you for your interest about my house, yes is still available for rent. I am renting this house to a responsible and neat person or family who has the fear of God and treat my house as his or her own. Presently I and my wife have work for USAID. USAID works in agriculture, democracy & governance, economic growth, the environment, education, health, global partnerships, and humanitarian assistance in more than 100 countries to provide a better future for all. USAID still faces an uncertain future. In many developing countries, HIV/AIDS and health issues are having a dramatic impact on social cohesiveness and economic strength, blocking the very development goals we seek. Virtually all the new democracies in the world today are fragile; others are democracies more in name than substance.
Nearly a quarter of the people living in developing countries, or about one billion people, live in absolute poverty. There are a host of other threats - ranging from terrorism to infectious disease and violent conflict - that challenge us and the developing nations we seek to help. Here is USAID Web address:-www.usaid.gov.
USAID efforts to foster world-wide economic growth and increased trade and tackling cross-border issues such as the spread of HIV/AIDS and trafficking in persons. To safe the live of peoples from primitive death that claims the souls of younger ages as a result of casual sex gave us transfer to OKLAHOMA and we will be away for 5 years or more and this is why we are actually renting out house,so if you are interested and will take good care of our house then we will be ready to accept you as our future tenant and family friend. If you really impress me by taking good care of our house then you will be allowed to stay as long as you wish okay.
This is the address of the Place : ## N Sedgwick St, Chicago, IL 60614
So get back to me on how you could take care of our house or perhaps experience you have in renting home. Hope you are okay with the price of $1000/month and $800 for security deposit with hydro, heat, laundry facilities, air condition and so on. PETS ARE WELCOME!
I am looking forward to hear from you ASAP so that i can forward you an application to fill out and discuss on how to get the house for rent, also are you ready to rent it now or when?
Await your reply.
I'd like to pick out the highlights but there are too many. Needless to say, this reeks of some kind of money wiring scam involving Nigeria, Western Union, and maybe a lost prince, but it is still amazing that someone chose this angle in attempt to steal money. My friends had some funny reactions, too:
"So in case you don't have what they call "the street smarts," I would not send any personal info to these people. Clearly they live at 2045 N Sedwick, Lagos Nigeria."
"'From: Lovely Home'? if these walls could talk..."
"I really hope the lease agreement is like 500 pages long and is all statistics on aids and sex trafficking"
"'Hydro'! How has 'hydro' not replaced 'water' in the English language yet? I'm going to make that happen."