Posts tagged "United Center"

ESPN's Bristol Headquarters Spontaneously Combust After Bulls Victory Over Miami Heat

ESPN's Bristol Headquarters Spontaneously Combust After Bulls Victory Over Miami Heat
BRISTOL – A fiery ball of light could be seen as far away as New York City late Wednesday night.  The explosion was the result of the Miami Heat’s 27 game winning streak coming to an end at the hands of the Chicago Bulls.  ESPN’s Bristol, Connecticut facilities combusted shortly after the buzzer sounded at Chicago’s... Read more »

The Best 90 Seconds in Sports

The Best 90 Seconds in Sports
Randy is a 45 year old construction worker from Berwyn.  He wears a scuffed up White Sox hat, torn blue jeans, and an old Hawks jacket that has a stain covering the entire right sleeve.  Randy is standing next to Bruce; a fellow season ticket holder from Lake Bluff.  Bruce works at the mercantile exchange... Read more »

Detroit Red Wings Family Mistakenly Leaves Pack of Newports, Scratch-Offs, and WWE T-Shirts at United Center After Game Versus Blackhawks

Detroit Red Wings Family Mistakenly Leaves Pack of Newports, Scratch-Offs, and WWE T-Shirts at United Center After Game Versus Blackhawks
CHICAGO – The Burson family left the United Center in a dreary mood. Their favorite team, the Detroit Red Wings, had just lost to the Chiago Blackhawks 2-1.  A five hour family trip from Baldwin, Michigan to Chicago was fun for the group of four, but the loss put a hamper on the evening. However,... Read more »
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Bulls Coach Thibodeau Straining to Find Things to Stess About After Hot Start; Bludgeoning of Cavs

Bulls Coach Thibodeau Straining to Find Things to Stess About After Hot Start; Bludgeoning of Cavs
CLEVELAND – Sitting alone in the visitor’s coaching office, Chicago Bulls head coach Tom Thibodeau searched for new things to be angry about. “This Gatorade is warm!” said a frustrated Thibodeau as he slammed a cup to the ground.  “How are we supposed to win a championship with this Gatorade!” Thibodeau has been searching valiantly... Read more »

Top 10 things your Grandpa says about Chicago's past

10. They never made another park like Riverview. You’re right, Gramps.  They never did.  That’s because Riverview’s old.  God bless the place, but why go to Chicago when you can drive out to the outskirts of Gurnee to be surrounded by mullet-wearing weirdos? 9. I remember when Chicago had more than three newspapers.  I like... Read more »
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