ALSIP- James Raisor of Alsip tends to forget things.
Among his calendar's events are reminders for family picnics, groceries, days to pick up his kids from school, and due dates for bills. Each of the reminders are penned-in at the start of each month.
However, only one event is penciled in right from the start of the year.
"I get a calendar every year from my daughter Judy. It's an annual calendar called 'Hot Rods and Hot Babes'. Can't beat it...you see, you got these hot cars...and they put hot babes next to the hot cars. It's pretty on, man. Pret-ty on. Well, that bein' said; I just grab my pen every time I get that calendar on Christmas; rip that sunofabitch right open. I find a pen in the kitchen, and then I turn to September. I find the first Saturday in September and write 'Start Hating Notre Dame Again'."
It may seem a bit tedious, but Raisor insists he needs the reminder.
"Well, you know, life is busy. You go through the whole summer workin' on homes, and, well, you're just focusing on the job more than anything else. By the time September comes, you're lookin' to settle down. I love that first Saturday in September. Football galore. I usually grab myself a Miller Lite and plop myself on the couch. And let me get this off my chest...Budweiser is for pussies! You hear that? Pussies. If you like Budweiser, then you should just go to your grandmother's grave and relieve yourself! Flippin' redneck communist sumbitch. Anyway, just had to get that off my chest. Where were we? Oh, yeah, football. Well, I'm sitting down, and it's been so long, I don't even remember who I root for...well, that's why I start putting a reminder on my calendar to hate Notre Dame. It makes it easy."
While Raisor may not have gone to any rival school of the Irish, he feels his hatred is rooted in deep principles.
"They don't have logos on their helmets. That just seems silly. It's the same reason I hate the Cleveland Browns. You can't think of some intricate drawing of an Irishman to put on the helmet? Just silliness. Plus, where's the flyovers, smoke machines? Plus, they get their own network? For what? Let me tell you something...we've got a channel for cars (Speed Channel) and we get a channel for war battles (History Channel)...However, we can't get a channel that shows carwars and/or car battles? But we have a channel for Notre Dame? Tell me the fairness in that? If ND gets their own station, then the least the world can do for me is a channel where cars filled with machine guns go to war against armed alien foreign cars. And I don't think that's asking much. Not at all."
While Notre Dame's television contract seems to bother Raisor, he says he'll still continue to watch college football.
"It's the best thing on TV. I'll get into the season, watch the conference races, be mesmerized by the conference title games, and then realize how ridiculous it is that there is no playoff system. I'll be extremely angry, swear off college football...and then I'll return. Well, right after I remember to mark my calendar at the start of the year."
And so it begins.
Filed under: Uncategorized
Tags: college football, Notre Dame, Notre Dame Fighting Irish
