Top 10 things your Grandpa says about Chicago's past

10. They never made another park like Riverview.

You're right, Gramps.  They never did.  That's because Riverview's old.  God bless the place, but why go to Chicago when you can drive out to the outskirts of Gurnee to be surrounded by mullet-wearing weirdos?

9. I remember when Chicago had more than three newspapers.  I like options with

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Your grandpa's childhood home...in six feet of snow...in the dead of winter.

newspapers.

Given the writers I see in the Sun-Times and (removing gag from mouth) the Tribune, I'm glad we only have two.  God knows we don't have enough decent writers for three papers in this town.

8. Lake Shore Drive used to have a tougher S-curve.

And given the amount of whiskey you drank back in the 50's, I'm surprised you survived those drives!

7. The old Stadium was louder than this United Center.

Grandpa is right on this one.  I miss the Stadium.

6. People could tell where you lived by your parish!

I get this...the problem is, I have to know too many places in Chicago.  So, you're telling me I gotta know the streets, the landmarks, AND the parishes?  That's a little too much.  Just tell me you're from Stickney, and I'll get there.

5. I remember the smell from the stockyards!

If it smelled anything like Aunt Ethel's homemade liverwurst that means I can get the effect without living in old Chicago!

4. I only knew one mayor for the majority of my life!

I guess certain things bridge generations.

3. I went to a dance at the Aragon Ballroom.

Okay, that's cool.  I always wanted to go to an old school ball.  That's back when men treated women well.  Guess we've lost some innocence since then.  Chicago Tough is getting a little misty.

2. We used to go to the Lake on the hot days in the summer.  People would sleep by the Lakeshore to cool off.

This was obviously before air conditioning became the norm.  Could you imagine this now?  Do you know how many people I don't want to be around.  Hell, I barely answer my phone anymore.  This entire blog was created to keep people away from me.  Now I've got to sleep on the lake with the rest of the city?  Guess they had a better sense of community back then.

1. I'm not sitting in line for the Walnut Room again.  45 minutes makes me want to kill somebody.

See, your grandpa agrees with you on something!

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