Everyone has them. Going to dinner can spark a passionate debate amongst friends, business colleagues or maybe even the server! But, I know I'm not the only one in need of free therapy! Comment away and who knows maybe I'll add a section on reader pet peeves as they come in.
I'll add to this page from time to time and even try to add pictures. When new additions make the list, I promise to post and let you know.
Sooo....Now it's time to buckle up and enjoy the ride.
As of June 19, 2010
- Bloggers, Food Critics who have never done what they're critiquing. SHAME!
- The bartender in the background on "Check, Please!" pretending to work. How clean is that glass? And who is he pouring wine for? Am I supposed to think they're taping in a restaurant? Because it's the quietest, uncrowded place in the city.
- Parsley on the rim of the plate as garnish! Are you 3 yrs old coloring outside the lines? Focus on the food you're plating in the middle, don't OVER garnish! The chef might as well stick a sprig of rosemary like a skyscraper in the mash potatoes.
- Every dish has the same vegetable/garnish...hmmm...one word: lazy! Well unless you're on a cruise, wait you're not on a cruise. I give you permission to go donkey punch the chef so they can regain their senses.
- When a chef talks about how they only cook with fresh ingredients! Really do you know of anyone cooking with spoiled food? I want that for my $40 entrée.
- Speaking of a entrée costing $40, how is it justified if it it isn't a steak, anything with truffles, caviar, foie gras or being served in NYC.
- A server who doesn't know what they're talking about - food, preparation or wine take your pick. I know you make good money, learn it!
- Servers who can't pronounce items...who am I kidding? Actually I find this hilarious!
- A chef who cooks with only local ingredients...um ok, build a menu during January in the Midwest - go? Just like refrigerated rail cars opened up America to send fresh produce EVERYWHERE, airplanes can help bring things in from other HEMISPHERES. Help the poor nations out; you know what on second thought never ever serve Norwegian Salmon or Alaskan Crab. This is different than sustainable.
- In Hawaii or any other island vacation spot - "This fish is fresh caught and they dock down the street" - the cost of the Oompa Lumpa fish will be $40 - question, if you got it from down the block why the F is it $40? Do you drive a Bentley to pick it up? Love that BS!
- Friend takes you to the BEST, THE BEST restaurant - but tonight was just an off night. Uh huh sure!
- Diners who want to alter everything on the menu - STAY HOME! If you have an allergy mention it but if you don't... ask yourself would you tell the conductor to get rid of the string section?
- Wine Lists that are priced from $10-20 and then $150 or more...hi, it's called options.
- The person who tries to weasel a table at 7pm on a Friday when they never made a reservation - you are fooling no one.
- Anyone who says they know the owner...lol no you don't! Ass...
- Cooking shows on TV with "chefs" who can't cook or are dirty.
- Guy Fieri, wash your hands!
- Oh and the Neelys, count how many hey baby!-ies are said! Ugh, pretend children are present...
- Breakfast eggs that costs more then $12 - you're not the four seasons and they're EGGS! Orange, you know what I'm talking about! If you're reading this SALT those nasty potatoes please.
- Soy milk...um milk comes from a mammal, soy comes from a bean - so its juice. But how is it not the same as soy sauce???
- How vegans try to convince you that protein from a bean is just as good as a steak...Never going to happen. In America we can all choose, I just think you've chosen poorly.
- Server's who blame the kitchen - you're all on the same team in my book.
- Chef's who don't taste their food. I'd like you to meet SALT! Say hi SALT.
- People who don't do mayo because they can't eat dairy! Um, there's no milk in it. I know it's white but there's no milk. Eggs don't come from cows.
Tell me what drives you nuts or maybe just so stupid it makes you laugh.
chicagofoodsnob@hotmail.com
twitter @chifoodsnob
