My Last Post Ever…

My Last Post Ever…
Courtesy of Food Beauty

When it comes to talking about the Michelin Guide, I’m done. It’s not you, it’s me. When we first met, it was Paris and love was in the air. The food at Pierre Gagnaire was where we fell in love and then that little spot by the Eiffel Tower for steak tartare, such wonderful memories. But we’ve both changed, and I loved who you were not what you’ve become.

We all change and grow older but we’ve grown apart. You used to love service and the trappings of dinner now you seem content with a meal that fills you up. We used to laugh over wine and now it doesn’t even matter to you. What have you become? Where did it go wrong? I once gazed in to your eyes as you made me swoon with your talk of haute cuisine. Now you just seem to care that it’s hot enough to eat.

Maybe, I’m romanticizing the past and what we once were but I can’t do this anymore. I’m not happy. I can’t eat at a place without any soul and known for a diabetic ball of dough. I can’t tell my friends about the places you recommend because you’ll send them to a place full of men in plaid where bussers fill their water bottles with a funnel and a bar gun. You don’t seem to get out like you once used to. You stick to places close to home and take the easy way out when picking the typical spots. When did you last take a chance? Where did your adventurous spirit go? I just don’t feel challenged anymore when we go out. You remind me of that girl I met once in a suburban mall before I ever knew what “good” food was.

I don’t mean to hurt you. I care for you greatly and hope you find your way again. We just can’t be together. My friends wonder why if I don’t care I mention your name. It made me realize I’m stuck in the past. This isn’t healthy for you or me. Perhaps, we’ll run in to each other again but I’m doubtful since you run with a new crowd. I hope you find happiness again. I know the move from LA and Vegas were hard on you but maybe now is the time to take a look in the mirror. Maybe, now is the time to have a self-intervention because I want you to do well in life.

I’ll remember the good times we’ve had. You will always have a special place in my heart. You were my first love. Because of our past, I want you to hear it from me first and not through the rumor mill. I’ve been seeing Gayot. It’s still so new and who knows if it will last but I have to give it a shot and be true to myself. I feel young again. You know how sexy, European women do it for me.

And I know you never believed me…but nothing ever happened with Yelp or Qype. Perhaps, we’ll be friends in the future, but if not, know I wish you the best of luck but our time together now is over.

Joe Campagna is the Chicago Food Snob. A former restaurant General Manager, Server and Chef you can find him on twitter @chifoodsnob. You can reach him through email at Joe also contributes to Chicago and

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