Need to talk college bball smack, but don't watch college bball? Statsheet has you covered

StatSheet, a giant online compedium of college football, major league baseball, and, primarily, college basketball scores, stats and data has been a leader in automated sports content recently.

The giant even has dedicated content bureaus with unique stories and websites for every D-I basketball team (here's DePaul's), but I found one of their latest features to be of special interest.

Still in beta, the StatSmack tool generates 'smack' so that, for example UIC fans can easily select the Flames in the top box and their team of choice, let's say VCU,  to 'smack' in the bottom box. Hit enter, and out comes a tweet-able and objective list of ways that UIC is "'better" than VCU.

Although a lot of the smack is predictably easily debunked in overmatched matchups like this, it's no less interesting to read. Here's the UIC over VCU StatSmack output:

UIC is better than Virginia Commonwealth this season
Tweet UIC has not had the opportunity to beat Virginia Commonwealth in the last 30 years (maybe they are scared?)
Tweet UIC is a better rebounding team (36.4 per game vs 32.0 per game) than Virginia Commonwealth this season
 UIC players are better than Virginia Commonwealth players
Tweet Since 1998 UIC has recruited more Top 50 high school players than Virginia Commonwealth (1 vs 0)
Tweet The UIC three-point leader (Robo Kreps) has more three-pointers than the Virginia Commonwealth three-point leader (Brandon Rozzell)
Tweet The UIC rebounding leader (Paul Carter) has more rebounds than the Virginia Commonwealth rebounding leader (Jamie Skeen)
 The Horizon is a better conference than the CAA
Tweet The Horizon has had better winning percentage in the NCAA Tournament over the past 10 years (53.5 vs 36.8)
Tweet Last year the best team in the Horizon had a much higher RPI than the best team in the CAA (7 vs 29)
Tweet The Horizon has teams that are better at scoring, blocks, shooting percentage, and assists than any team in the CAA
Tweet The top ranking player between the two conferences for points, free throws made, three pointers, assists, steals, and blocks is in the Horizon.

Yes, Paul Carter had more rebounds last season than Jamie Skeen last season, but that means very little out of context.

More realistic smacking, Northwestern over Chicago State for example, produces predictably better results.

Northwestern is better than Chicago State this season
Tweet Northwestern has a stronger schedule than Chicago State this season (SOS Rank: #68 vs #324)
Tweet Computers think Northwestern is better with an RPI this season that is better than Chicago State (RPI: #89 vs #339)
Tweet Northwestern has a better overall record than Chicago State this season (18-13 vs 6-26)
Tweet Northwestern has a better record at home than Chicago State this season (12-4 vs 4-6)
Tweet Northwestern has a better conference record than Chicago State this season (7-11 vs 3-9)
Tweet Northwestern has blown out more teams than Chicago State this season (5 blowouts vs 0)
Tweet Northwestern has more wins against the RPI Top 50 than Chicago State this season (2 vs 0)
Tweet Northwestern is a better shooting team (45.1% vs 40.1%) than Chicago State this season
Tweet Northwestern is a better free-throw shooting team (72.5% vs 64.8%) than Chicago State this season
Tweet Northwestern is a better three-point shooting team (37.6% vs 29.5%) than Chicago State this season
Tweet Northwestern has a better rebound defense (33.6 allowed per game vs 41.6 allowed per game) than Chicago State this season
Tweet Northwestern has a better scoring defense (67.9 allowed per game vs 86.6 allowed per game) than Chicago State this season
 Northwestern is better than Chicago State historically
Tweet Northwestern has more wins over the last 5 years than Chicago State (90 vs 65)
Tweet Northwestern has a much better overall winning percentage over the last 10 years (0.484 to 0.302)
Tweet Northwestern destroyed Chicago State by 23 points the last time they played (Mar 03, 2010)
Tweet Northwestern has defeated Chicago State the last 9 times they've played.
Tweet Northwestern has an average margin of victory of 20 over Chicago State in 9 wins since 1981
Tweet Northwestern has blown out Chicago State by 20 points or more on 4 occasions since 1997
 Northwestern players are better than Chicago State players
Tweet Northwestern has recruited more McDonald's All-Americans out of high school than Chicago State (1 vs 0)
Tweet Northwestern players are more experienced than Chicago State players (17,237 minutes played vs 14,557 minutes played)
Tweet The Northwestern three-point leader (Michael Thompson) has more three-pointers than the Chicago State three-point leader (Jon Montgomery)
Tweet The Northwestern assist leader (Michael Thompson) has more assists than the Chicago State assist leader (Antonio Lofton)
Tweet The Northwestern steals leader (Michael Thompson) has more steals than the Chicago State steals leader (Jon Montgomery)
Tweet Northwestern is taller. The average height of the top 8 players on Northwestern is 77.6 inches compared to 75.1 inches for Chicago State
Tweet Northwestern is bigger. The average weight of the top 8 players on Northwestern is 206 lbs compared to 193 lbs for Chicago State
Tweet Michael Thompson is ranked 49th nationally in three pointers
 The Big Ten is a better conference than the Great West
Tweet The Big Ten has had 33 more NBA Draft picks than the Great West over the past 10 years
Tweet The Big Ten has had 7 more Final Four teams than the Great West over the past 10 years
Tweet The Big Ten has had 24 more Sweet Sixteen teams than the Great West over the past 10 years
Tweet The Big Ten has had 53 more NCAA Tournament teams than the Great West over the past 10 years
Tweet The Big Ten has a conference RPI that is better than the Great West (2 vs 33)
Tweet The Big Ten has a stronger schedule this year compared to the Great West (2 vs 33)
Tweet The Big Ten has a much better average team RPI than the Great West (66 vs 313)
Tweet The best team in the Big Ten has a much higher RPI than the best team in the Great West (2 vs 256)
Tweet The worst team in the Big Ten has a much higher RPI than the worst team in the Great West (181 vs 345)
Tweet The Big Ten has a much better non-conference game winning percentage than the Great West (0.748 vs 0.338)
Tweet The Big Ten lost fewer non-conference blowout games than the Great West (1 vs 31)
Tweet The Big Ten had more close games in conference (so the games are more exciting to watch) than in the Great West
Tweet The Big Ten has teams that are better at assist-to-turnover ratio, three-point shooting, blocks, free throw shooting, shooting percentage, and assists than any team in the Great West
Tweet The top ranking player between the two conferences for rebounds, field goals made, three pointers, assists, and blocks is in the Big Ten

Here's the oddball reverse, Chicago State over Northwestern:

 Chicago State is better than Northwestern this season
Tweet Chicago State is ranked higher than Northwestern in their conference (#5 vs #8)
Tweet Chicago State is a better rebounding team (35.5 per game vs 29.6 per game) than Northwestern this season
 Chicago State players are better than Northwestern players
Tweet The Chicago State blocks leader (Carl Montgomery) has more blocks than the Northwestern blocks leader (John Shurna)
Tweet The Chicago State rebounding leader (Carl Montgomery) has more rebounds than the Northwestern rebounding leader (Luke Mirkovic)
Tweet The Chicago State scoring leader (Carl Montgomery) has more points than the Northwestern scoring leader (Michael Thompson)
 The Great West is a better conference than the Big Ten
Tweet The Great West has teams that are better at scoring, steals, and rebounding than any team in the Big Ten
Tweet The top ranking player between the two conferences for points, free throws made, and steals is in the Great West

And here, I'll save you the effort of the Centenary vs. Duke matchup (the arguably worst and best teams from last season).

Centenary really just has nothing on Duke:

The Summit League is a better conference than the ACC
Tweet The Summit League has teams that are better at scoring, assist-to-turnover ratio, three-point shooting, free throw shooting, and shooting percentage than any team in the ACC
Tweet The top ranking player between the two conferences for three pointers and blocks is in the Summit League

Duke has everything on Centenary. Check the link.

The Chicago matchups, for your mid-march 2012 Facebook updates.

DePaul over Chicago State

Chicago State over DePaul

Chicago State over Northwestern

Northwestern over Chicago State

Loyola over Chicago State

Chicago State over Loyola

Chicago State over UIC

UIC over Chicago State

UIC over DePaul

DePaul over UIC

DePaul over Northwestern

Northwestern over DePaul

Northwestern over Loyola

Loyola over Northwestern

Loyola over UIC

UIC over Loyola

UIC over Northwestern

Northwestern over UIC

Loyola over DePaul

DePaul over Loyola

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