Posts tagged "babies"

Let's take an infant to a concert and other selfish parenting moves

Let's take an infant to a concert and other selfish parenting moves
First off, none of us are perfect parents. None. Of. Us. Nope, not you. Not me. Really, you’re not. Stop acting. But, we are all taught a level of common sense. We are born with a brain. They are made to think, to process. So, when it comes to our kids, why aren’t we using... Read more »

15 Things I Wish I Knew About Labor and Delivery

15 Things I Wish I Knew About Labor and Delivery
My son just celebrated his second birthday last week. As we were driving home from his birthday celebration, I looked at the clock and realized it was 7:51pm. The moment he arrived in this world. I remembered the relief I felt when he was finally here. I also remember the 29 hours before. I can... Read more »

Psychic Pregnancy Readings..Friend or Foe

Psychic Pregnancy Readings..Friend or Foe
One of the online mommy groups I readily visit recently shared a thread about psychic pregnancy readings. One of the women in the group recently had her cards read and shared her findings with the group. Suddenly the board lit up like a Christmas tree and at least 30 other women shared that they too... Read more »
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The Chicago Blackhawks Ruined My Sex Life (and other $hit I like to tell myself)

The Chicago Blackhawks Ruined My Sex Life (and other $hit I like to tell myself)
They lost! They freaking lost! The cup! The Stanley Cup! The Chicago Blackhawks lost! UGH! You know what else was lost? Eggs. As in my eggs. You know the kind that needs sperm to fertilize. Sperm from a man. As in sex. From my partner. As in playoff hockey killed my eggs. Really? Really! I’d... Read more »

Letter to a New Mom: Take Care of Yourself

Letter to a New Mom: Take Care of Yourself
ChicagoNow bloggers have teamed up to write letters to new moms in honor of Mother’s Day. You can read all of their incredible posts here. Dear New Mom: Boy these past couple of weeks have been exciting! From labor and delivery to arriving home with your new bundle of joy, you’ve barely had a chance... Read more »

Children...The Ultimate Karma

Children...The Ultimate Karma
Recently I had an awkward moment with a patron in a restaurant. You know that moment when your kid is having a meltdown and you look up and some asshole is shaking his head at you and mumbling to his partner about how awful your kid is? Awkward because I let him know right back... Read more »
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First Haircut Heartbreak

First Haircut Heartbreak
The time had finally come. We couldn’t put it off any longer. It was time for my son’s first haircut. I kept delaying the inevitable. Partially because I didn’t want to let go.  Let go of the baby. But mostly because we knew he was going to be a royal a-hole for it. After  the... Read more »

A Look at My Current Parenting Self: I'm Still Kind of an A-Hole

A Look at My Current Parenting Self: I'm Still Kind of an A-Hole
I recently came across an article titled A Letter to My Pre-Parenting Self: “You’re Kind of an A-Hole”.  The author, who is now a mom, basically wrote herself an “I told you so” letter. It hit me right here. You see, I could have totally written that letter. I was a pre-parenting asshole.  I was... Read more »

Why Your Baby's Second Christmas Might Still Suck

Why Your Baby's Second Christmas Might Still Suck
Ahh, baby’s first Christmas. The cute photos by the tree, the adorable velvet Santa Claus outfit, sleeping through the unwrapping of the gifts. Everyone telling you “it will be so much fun next year” Umm… No. Your baby’s second Christmas might still suck. Depending on the age of your child for his/her second Christmas, it... Read more »
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New Father Fail

Today I did a good deed. Today I looked like a Goddess. Today I was somebody’s vision in white. Today I assisted a new father in the parking lot of the hospital remove an uninstalled infant carrier from its base. Today I wanted to slap the ever loving shit out of him. Today he learned... Read more »