I have the luxury of having a 7-year old as well as a 17-year old. Therefore I live in two very different worlds - one filled with new (fresh/untainted) moms and the other blessed with old (seasoned/experienced/wise) moms. I vacillate between the two often and have taken a few notes over the years and can't help but notice some big differences.
NEW MOM: While talking to others, runs her fingers through her kid's hair
OLD MOM: While talking to others, mindlessly reaches to the table behind her wondering if anyone filled up her wine glass
NEW MOM: Goes into school conferences with a list of questions and concerns
OLD MOM: Goes into school conferences with a list of que…. who am I kidding, we only go if we really have to
NEW MOM: Struggles because baby won't sleep through the night
OLD MOM: Struggles to stay awake to make sure their driving kid comes home safely
NEW MOM: Interrogates and analyzes every friend their kid brings home or even talks about
OLD MOM: Is just happy their kid has a friend
NEW MOM: "My biggest issue is keeping them from eating high fructose corn syrup"
OLD MOM: "My biggest issue is keeping them from going to alcohol and drug filled parties"
NEW MOM: Volunteers for everything
OLD MOM: Volunteers for only the essentials - has developed the skill of saying, "NO"
NEW MOM: When there's a scream from the other room, she goes running
OLD MOM: When there's a scream from the other room, she pauses and hopes no one finds her
NEW MOM: When there's an injury, she pulls out bacitracin, peroxide, bandages, etc.
OLD MOM: When there's an injury says, "As long as no one is missing a limb, I don't want to hear about it"
NEW MOM: "I'm nervous, my sweetie wants to go into the bathroom by himself"
OLD MOM: "I'm nervous, my kid wants to go to a coed sleepover after prom"
NEW MOM: Do you think that Disney movie was too controversial for the kids?
OLD MOM: Do you think my 7-year old has watched too many PG-13 movies?
NEW MOM: Wants everything to be perfect
OLD MOM: Wants everything to be adequate
NEW MOM: Celebrates every new milestone
OLD MOM: Is terrified of every new milestone (first boyfriend, driver's license, extended curfew…)
NEW MOM: Dresses everyone in crisp, matching outfits
OLD MOM: Cringes a little when they see their kid walking onto the bus and realizes they wore that outfit yesterday
NEW MOM: My child would NEVER do that
OLD MOM: My child did that
NEW MOM: We had too much to drink last night so we called a cab to pick us up
OLD MOM: We had too much to drink last night so we called my daughter to pick us up
I love being in both worlds - it helps me keep perspective and appreciate every single moment. There are no mommy wars going on here, it's just enjoying our differences. I remember being one of those new moms and doing pretty much everything I've listed.
Raising my 7-year old with all this experience has been simply amazing. Struggling with my 17 year old has been exciting/terrifying/challenging/exhausting… and every other emotion - the roller coaster sucks, but the designated driver thing is pretty awesome.
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