Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays White Sox fans. I always think of Christmas morning as meant for children, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have certain holiday wishes for current and former White Sox players. To wit…

For Aaron Bummer:

A new first name to represent a slogan for the 2018 season, Total Bummer.

For James Shields: 

A new suitcase and a one way ticket to anywhere but 35th and Shields.

For Adam Dunn and Adam LaRoche:

Two new consciences, enabling both of them to write checks and give the White Sox their money back.

For Hawk Harrelson:

He is broadcasting 20 games in 2018 to conclude a 34-year broadcasting career with the White Sox. He deserves 19 wins (I need 1 loss; losses bring out the famous Hawk homerism and vitriol that I will sorely miss).

For Mark Buehrle:

One more start.

For A.J. Pierzynski:

Steve Stone’s spot upon his retirement.

For Carlos Rodon:

Chris Sale’s durability and a new agent (everybody hates Scott Boras, even his mother).

For Tim Anderson:

A breakout season.

For Adam Engel:

A bat that works as well as his glove.

For Avi Garcia:

A contract extension in June after a 15 home run, 50 runs batted in, .340 batting average, and .400 on base percentage start to the season.

For Matt Davidson:

The ability to lay off the low and outside breaking ball when he is playing for the Tampa Rays.

For Mike Stickann:

Matt Davidson is traded to the Tampa Rays for a broken coffee maker.

Have a safe and joyous holiday and New Year!

Next: Comparing the likely 2018 White Sox roster with the rest of the American League Central.

Leave a comment