For the month of May, I want to feature 31 women who continue to touch my life through their kindness, friendship, humor, passion, and determination. Each of these women have some great secrets as they open their doors and let me into their "mommy world". Their stories bring us back to the realization that we all go through struggles, make mistakes, and sometimes need to "fake it until we make it" as parents. Join us as we celebrate these mothers throughout the month of May.
Welcome to day 27 of Bulldog’s Mommy Blog Project! Today we get to feature my sister, Kelly Hayes. This mom values family time and creates teachable moments for her kids. She is focused on watching her kids learn, grow, and be the best they can be. Before we learn more about how my sister channels her inner greatness, let’s learn about the parenting tip of the day.
Parenting Tip of the Day: Learn how to overcome procrastination. I find that I procrastinate on the things I hate to do such as cleaning the bathroom, or the things I am not so good at like editing research papers for publications. I love to have a clean bathroom and write about bullying, but these things can be time demanding or challenging so I often put them off until the last minute. When that final hour approaches, then I am in "Go-GO" mode and putting out the fire! This adds stress to my life, and it's not productive. So, think about what you are putting off doing and why. Then come up with an action plan to tackle it. Here are some tips to overcome procrastination:
- Put the task in your calendar and set up a reminder. Block out time to tackle your project.
- Break down your project into mini tasks so you can check things off your list as you go.
- Find an accountability partner. Use your spouse or partner to keep you on track.
- Track your progress.
- Create a realistic timeline.
- Celebrate your mini successes.
For more info or tips click on our website: Parent Coaching
Kelly is my other older sister. She is filled with love and positivity. Kelly manages so much and has built a successful enterprise. She works hard, but also takes the time to be present with her kids. I admire the way my sister just lives her life. She is beautiful, confident, and intelligent. She is kind and so giving. I often wonder how she does it all and still manages to look put together. I always looked up to Kelly, and found that being around her truly inspires others to be the best version of themselves. Our family has been through massive amounts of loss and tragedy. Kelly used those experiences to embrace life and live to her fullest potential.
Please welcome my incredible and influential sister, Kelly Hayes, to our Mommy Blog Project!
Name: Kelly Hayes
Location: Orlando, Florida
Mommy Title: Mommy Coach, Business Owner/ President of KSA
Favorite Social Media Site: Facebook
Mommy Status: Married
Number of kids: 3
Age: 11, 9, 6
Gender: 2 Girls and a Boy
Walk me through a day in your household.
It is insane! I wake up at 6am and return emails for about 40 minutes because I don’t work normal hours. I need to get my staff set up for the day, reply to clients, confirm meetings, and delegate tasks so everything runs smoothly. I get the kids up and while they are showering, I'm reviewing their homework. Each day, my kids study a little bit so that the night before a test they are not learning something new. Then while they are eating breakfast, we spend 15 minutes going over their flashcards, math, or readings so they start the day out fresh and eager to learn. I can actually see how much they are learning and I am getting smarter too!
After that, I get the kids in the car, drop them off at their class, and spend some time talking to the teachers. I come home and I walk the dog. Isn’t it insane that I need to come home and walk the dog? I'm often asking myself: WHY did we adopt a dog again? Then, I meet my husband at the gym and we workout for an hour. This is my stress relief. I get to my office at 10:15am and work until 3pm. Between my husband and I, one of us picks up the kids. They do basketball, drama, and volleyball so we need to split up and carpool with two cars to get everyone to their practice on time. We get home and do homework and dinner.
What is your favorite room in the house and why?
Probably my bedroom because we have a big bed and I love to have my kids in the bed with me. It is a space that is quiet, serene, and special for my family. It is where we can just relax and be together. We cuddle in the morning and we talk about their day. Sometimes my kids creep into our bed one by one. One time, there was no room for my husband and he ended up sleeping on the couch!
What is your favorite time of the day with your kids?
It's the morning because I get that special time with them and I tell them: "Make sure you make a difference today, make today count, so don’t give it away!" I also love carpool time with the kids. We talk, listen to music, sing, and get silly. I love those moments! In the car, I am present with them and I feel connected.
What is a unique family tradition?
We celebrate EVERYTHING! Literally...we celebrate volleyball championships, lead roles in a play, getting an "A", the tooth fairy, and even finishing a new book. One thing that we value and make special is birthdays. My kids have three celebrations for their birthdays. The first one is a special mom and dad day with them. They get to choose what they want to do and we get to connect with them individually. The second celebration is the family party. We invite the grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. My kids are especially close to their grandparents and text, email, or face time them everyday. It is beautiful to see these relationships evolve and we want to allow time to celebrate this at birthdays. Then the final celebration is the birthday extravaganza with all their friends. We do something special like a party, activity, or day at a theme park.
Another unique tradition we have is modeling a loving relationship for our kids. My husband and I both compliment each other in front of the kids. We only talk about the positive in front of them. My husband and I also do weekly date nights for just the two of us. Our kids love it and encourage it! You know, I waited to have kids. By the time I got pregnant, I wanted them so bad. It's important for me to be in a strong marriage and truly enjoy my family.
What do you do when you are overwhelmed?
I workout! I work a lot and I have massive amounts of communication between clients, board members, my leadership team, staff, friends, and family. When I workout, it is the one time my brain can shut down and I am not preoccupied. When I feel like there is so much going on, I go run or workout so I can regain that balance and look at things from a different perspective.
What is the best “uh-oh” story?
I had to fly with both girls by myself. I was in first class and I had bought a seat from my older daughter, but she was just 18 months old at the time. She refused to sit in her seat, but I was not allowed to hold her since I had my 6 month old daughter on my lap. I kid you not: they screamed for 3 hours straight. One daughter would be crying and it would instigate the other one to cry louder. There was no where to go. I felt so bad and I didn’t know what to do. At one point, the flight attendant came up to me and said, “Can you do something, I don’t know...like medicate them?” I was in shock! Nothing was helping my situation. At one point, I locked myself in the bathroom and cried with my girls. People were so rude. As soon as we landed, I bolted out of the plane, called my mom and said, “Meet me at the gate!” I got to the gate and gave her my kids. I ran out the door to get some air and I just lost it! I was sobbing in the middle of the arrival drop off. I just felt awful.
Which celebrity mom is most like you and why?
I truly admire Hillary Clinton. She is intelligent, strong, compassionate, and a good parent. I read her book, It Takes a Village. That is how I feel about my life! I could not be running a large organization without the support of my husband and extended family.
What is your favorite website or blog?
Well, I look at CNN all the time. I care about world events and women's issues. There is a ton of stuff about women on the news and it is good to know what is going on across the world. I am very much into advancing women and girls.
What advice would you give your younger self?
Take your time and enjoy every moment you have. My oldest daughter is like a mini adult and she is now taking care of the siblings, talking to adults, and striving at school. I remember bringing her home from the hospital and now I can’t believe where the time has gone! OMG, I feel like she just got here, but the reality is that she's 11.
What is your go to outfit?
Sundresses and a cardigan! I live in Florida so that is my go to outfit.
What is something you are pretending to know about but have no clue?
I often wonder about what is life is going to be like when my kids are my age? I have no idea! All I can do is share my own experiences, perceptions, and knowledge. When you think about it, each child has their own perception about the world. Two kids growing up in the same house can truly have different perceptions about how things are and the family dynamics. So I tell my kids, I can only tell you how I feel and how I see it. I often ask about their perceptions and how they experience things.
What have you learned from your kids?
EVERYTHING! I've learned how to love, how to feel sadness, and JOY! My life changed when my oldest daughter was born. I had a new perception on life and I saw what really matters. I had massive amounts of love to give, but I was a career woman focusing on building a successful business. The day she was born my whole life changed. I have been a VP and CEO, spoken at conferences, ran financial reports, and survived business crashes. All those things are easier than being a parent! I was happy before having kids, but now when I see my kids experience joy, it is the most POWERFUL feeling. When I see my kids succeed or feel proud of their accomplishments, it is pure joy for me.
If you could ask the universe one question what would it be?
How do I get better or improve as a person? I want to love more, trust more, and be better as a parent and wife.
What is the looming task on your to do list?
I am trying to buy a new house, so I have to get organized and get this one on the market. I want to pack up all the clothes, toys, and stuff. I want to get this house it tip top shape.
Closing thoughts, mantra, or advice:
If you love your kids, it will be enough. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Having the "guilty mom" complex and thinking, “I work too much”, is so hard to eliminate from your life. I often work at a crazy capacity: school, work, budgeting, homework, selling a house, getting a new car, texts, emails...and the list goes on and on! I'm constantly reminding myself to let that feeling go! As women, we don’t think we do enough, but really, we are doing a great job. Your kids will always see you as the best mom ever.
I would like to thank my sister Kelly Hayes for taking the time out of her extremely busy day to connect with me and share her love for motherhood. Kelly is an amazing leader and successful business owner. She grew KSA to be the leading provider in High School Sporting Events. She is a mover and shaker. I would not be surprised to see my sister being a famous author or politician of some sort. That is the kind of woman she is. She makes an impact on you and you never forget her.
Until Next Time...
Be Strong*Be Brave*Be a Bulldog
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Filed under: Mommy Blog Project