What to do on a rainy Autumn day? Go and see a double feature of course. And not just any double feature...we're talking about violence up the ying-yang in "Killer Elite" and "Straw Dogs." I came out of the theater half thinking that there wasn't anybody alive after all the killings I had just witnessed.
Let's take these two romantic comedies (kidding) in order. If "Killer Elite" had a plot, I still haven't figured it out. Basically Jason Statham is forced out of mercenary retirement to kill some former British spies for a Sultan, or Emir or whatever the hell this Arab bad guy was. Statham does what he's told and then some, as the bodies were dropping faster then fly balls in front of Alfonso Soriano. I do believe that Statham has the active clubhouse lead on confirmed kills on the big screen. Loved him in "Transporter" but ever since he has almost become a parody of himself with the excessive body count in one flick after another that are all the same.
And who is Robin to Statham's Batman in this movie? It's none other then Robert DeNiro. How I hate seeing major stars grab an easy paycheck and flush away their great reputations to be part of a crappy movie. "Taxi Driver," "Raging Bull," "Godfather," and now this garbage? Someone find this guy a good script. Clive Owen is also in this movie and I've honestly never cared for his acting so it figured that I didn't like him in this movie either...... a weak single - one star for this piece of junk.
Onward to movie number two, "Straw Dogs," which didn't have as many killings, but boy were they juicy ones, especially the one where a guy gets his head caught in a bear trap. I bet that got your attention.
This is a remake of the original from a while back that starred Dustin Hoffman. In a few short words the original was much much better.
The updated version takes place in the red neck south, where James Marsden brings his hot wife (Kate Bosworth) back to her home town, so he can write a screenplay for a movie. All the male rednecks are hot to trot to see Bosworth back home, and she has a bullseye on her immediately. Marsden plays a wimpy guy, who has to grow some kahunas before the movie is over. Even if you haven't seen the original you can pretty much guess how this movie develops.
Throw in James Woods, playing an aging psycho red neck football coach, and you have southern testosterone coming at you from all angles.
I'm going to be a bit kinder to this movie then the above because I liked the original and because Kate Bosworth was really nice eye candy. I might have been overly influenced by her, but I'll give "Straw Dogs" a ground rule double - two stars.
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