Relationship Lessons Learned from Jake and Vienna
So we all get to say a collective "I told you so." The latest TV bachelor Jake Pavelka, and Vienna Girardi, have split. No one who followed the story was the least bit surprised by their break-up as they were by Jake's choice of Vienna in the first place!
The predictable ending makes us feel smarter about our instincts, but if we seek a deeper truth, isn't there someone in each of our lives that made us lead with our heart instead of our head? Someone that neither our friends nor our family thought was worth the risk? Didn't we, like Jake, get so caught up in defending our choice of the moment that we forgot to ask ourselves whether or not that choice was what we really wanted long-term?
The Jake and Vienna lessons show that powerful chemistry is not likely the substance of which long-term relationships are made; that every couple needs time and privacy to determine whether or not their attraction can go the distance; and that while we may resent opinions voiced by others that do not confirm the absolute rigtness of our infatuations, we should nevertheless listen respectfully.
An even harder lesson is that people's past mistreatment of others is likely to be revisited, so a thoughtful contemplation of someone's personal history and previous relationship victims is worth doing. The best of the lessons that the ill-fated couple taught us is this: that being blinded by love can turn out to be very unromantic indeed. As a wise person once said, "It is better not to have what you think you want, than to find out too late that you have what you do not want."
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