Lights, camera...damn, where's my camera?

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While you and the kids were gawking at a rodent on a float, pickpockets and their lookouts were sizing you up as well as the other thousands of suburbanites bewildered by the Lights Festival this past weekend.

Beside the kid pointing a laser pen in a horse's face and nearly tossing off the rider, everything seemed to run smoothly from a police perspective; that is until it was over.

Our victims then realized as they returned to their minivans for the long trek back to Bolingbrook or Hoffman Estates that their wallets, cell phones, ipods, and the like were mysteriously missing.

I guess Mickey Mouse really wasn't worth driving into the city, being stuck on the Ohio exit ramp and then detoured, getting gouged by parking garages, and trampled by a stampede of Mitch Musso fans. Oh yeah, and getting pickpocketed.

In a crowd of people that massive, there is very little the police can do. High visibilty really doesn't deter crooks if we can't see them. Sure Mr. and Mrs. Cleaver can see the cop on the corner but I doubt the cop can even see past the horse manure he just stepped in. 311, the non-emergency number, got their fair share of theft reports from the festival.

It seems as if the moment the lights were switched on, people went nuts and wanted to get closer to the motorcade route. (That's right folks, the Lights Festival is technically a motorcade and not a parade because parades are prohibited on the Mag Mile....whatever, I'm sure it still costs the same!)

While I can't say that the smiles on children's faces didn't warm my heart, I would honestly like to see this festival go the way of Venetian Night. While I'm not trying to outdo Ebenezer Scrooge, the illegal vendors, the parking nightmare, traffic congestion, thefts, lost kids, and a barrage of other problems will keep me at home watching this on TV. And a "bah,humbug" to you.

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1 Comment

vaughnchicago said:

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Ah, the Holidays...that time of year when we think of Peace, Love, and what number do we need to call to cancel our stolen credit cards.

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