I Wish I'd Been at the Meeting Where Disney Greenlit 'Old Dogs'
Photo courtesy of Disney
The ad campaign for the John Travolta-Robin Williams vehicle "Old Dogs" begs a very important question: Is the tagline "From the Director of 'Wild Hogs'" really a good thing?
That's why I wish I had been at the meeting where a team of snazzy-suited executives from movie studio and Orwellian corporate dynasty Disney greenlit the screenplay for "Old Dogs."
Exec 1: Yeah, we got this screenplay from the director of "Wild Hogs" called "Old Dogs." Whaddya think?
Exec2: Wait, which one's "Wild Hogs?"
Exec3: The motorcycle one. With Tim Allen and Travolta.
Exec2: [Blank stare]
Exec3: Martin Lawrence. William H. Macy. They ride on motorcycles and get in a jam with Ray Liotta's biker gang and have to learn about friendship and s***.
Exec2: Oh, "Wild Hogs." Oh, yeah, for sure let's make this "Old Dogs" one then. What's it about?
Photo courtesy of Disney
You know: two friends and business partners find their lives turned upside down when strange circumstances lead to them being placed in the care of 7-year-old twins.
Exec2: Sounds great. Who we getting to star in it?
Exec3: Travolta's career is in a freefall again. He'll sign on.
Exec1: And Robin Williams. Everything about him just says "zany f****ing business partner."
Exec2: Now, wait a minute: you two can both go straight to hell if we're not gonna get some young blood in here with these goddamn old dogs.
Exec2: How 'bout Seth Green?
Exec3: At some point getting cradled by a big goddamn gorilla!
Exec1: Because he fell into the gorilla cage at the zoo!
Exec2: Brilliant. Gentlemen, we've done it again.
Exec1: Great. Send the script over to the director with our improvements. Now, let's go get some cocaine--for Chrissake, it's nearly noon.
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