A League of Her Own

Chicago Cubs Friday Headlines: Interactive Friday

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If you missed all the fun yesterday, a brief recap:

Around 2:00 yesterday afternoon, Will Carroll (formerly of Baseball Prospectus) tweeted that  Mike Quade was about to be named the next Cubs skipper, with our beloved Ryno by his side as bench coach.

The story kicked around for a while, eventually being picked up and reported by NBC sports via msnbc.com.

A fewbeat reporters and some self-important bloggers, no doubt reeling from the fact that this "breaking" story came from someone outside of Cubdom, begin passively-agressively tweeting veiled shots at Will, saying, in not so many words, that they don't believe him.

Mystery ensues.

Seriously.

That's it. Nothing new to report.

Alas, don't despair. In order to keep you distracted from all the gossip and innuendo flying around, LOHO is kicking off interactive Friday in style!

Community Project 1: Poll

LOHO wants to know, who's side are you on in Quadegage? Do you believe intrepid tweeter Will Carroll? Or do you think one of the Cubs beat reporters is likely to have more of an inside scoop?

Please vote:

 

Community Project 2: Getting In Touch With Your Feelings

Next up, writing letters to your younger self is all in vogue these days. Watch any touchy-feely women's show these days, and everyone is asking "what would you tell your younger self?" "If you could write a letter to your younger self, what would you say?"

Rather than getting all Oprah on you guys and having you whip out your feelings journals, LOHO wants to know: If you could go back in a time machine to the moment you decided to become a Cubs fan, what would you tell yourself?

Mine would look like this:

Dear Younger (Skinnier) Cubbiejulie,

So, you've decided to stick with the Cubs, eh? I can't really blame you, at least you come by it honestly. Still., after Game 6 of 1986 and your crush on Ron Darling, I held out hope that you'd look elsewhere.

There's so much I'd like to warn you about, but for now, I'll stick with these three things:

1)  Try for force Cubs management to trade a guy named "Corey Patterson" while his value is still high.

2) Start a campaign now encouraging fans along the baselines not to reach out over the field for foul balls.

3)  You're initial reaction re: Milton Bradley will be the right one.

Also, if you can get the phone number of a guy named "Steve Bartman" and advise him that going to Game 6 of the 2003 NLCS will ruin his life, he'll think you later.

Also, you're metabolism is really going to slow down after 30, so watch the snacks.

Love and kisses,

Future Julie

Community Project 3: Another Poll

I'm ridiculously annoyed that so many people are still blaming Steve Bartman for the collapse in 2003. Newsflash, if Alex Gonzalez could have fielded a routine grounder, if Dusty had been smart enough to pull his rookie pitcher, if Alou doesn't throw a tempertantrum over a ball he probably wouldn't have caught anyway, if one of the OTHER TWELVE PEOPLE going for the ball had caught it, if the Cubs hadn't fallen apart in Game 7, no one would even remember Steve Bartman's name.

Who do you blame for 2003? LOHO demands an answer.

 

 

Finally, because it's Friday, we want to hear what's on your iPod. Just hit "shuffle" and give us the first 5 songs that pop up. Remember, we're in the Trust Tree here. No making fun, except for Doc's inevitable, terrible Styx song.

Happy Friday, kids.

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55 Comments

J Pep said:

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project 2. I wouldn't change a thing. Was raised in Cardinal country and thought they were all asses then and that hasn't changed.

plamorte said:

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Community Project 2: I'd give my little self a sweet tasty sucker, let him have 2-3 delicious licks than take it from him and smash it on the ground. Then say "Sad, angry and disappointed?" Little me would shake his head yes and I would say "Get use to it, Go Cubs!"

Shuffle:
"Not A Second Time" - The Beatles
"Midnight In Her Eyes" - The Black Keys
"Untitled" - Eminem
"Erase Me" - Kid Cudi with Kayne West
"Silent Night" - Bing Crosby

Doc said:

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Rynoby?

JulieDiCaro said:

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shut up. i'm headed to court. someone fix it.

Doc said:

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iPod blah blah...

Queen of Spades - Styx
This is the Time - Dennis DeYoung
Midnight Ride - Styx
Christopher, Mr. Christopher - Styx
Dangerous Game - Tommy Shaw

:p

Teebob2000 said:

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...and that's his actual shuffle results with no editing. Sad, ain't it.

JulieDiCaro said:

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it's devastating, actually.

Cubs Psychologist said:

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Doc, just wanted to let you know that Styx will be in KY in November. So, if you are REALLY bored, come on down!!

Doc said:

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They will actually be in Waukegan this weekend...but I haven't actually gone to see the cover band calling themselves Styx for about 10 years now.

Teebob2000 said:

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A "Styx" purist... Ha!

sloan peterson said:

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I prefer "Girls with Guns", for Tommy Shaw. And where's Lorilei?

Rich Beckman said:

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Dear Younger Self,

So you are about to become a Cubs fan. That's OK. There will be lots of interesting years ahead along with a lot of boring years.

Just remember, after starting in January of '69 to save and carefully put into a scrapbook every article that mentions the Cubs (because you will KNOW that '69 is THE year) do not in disgust throw the thing away upon elimination.

Love, your Older Self

Cubs Psychologist said:

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Dear Younger Self,

You have decided to be a Cubs fan because this was your first little league team. Please do some research about the Cubs before you buy in and continue your desires to be a psychologist. Good luck and GO CUBS GO!!

Peace,
Your Older, Crazier Self

p.s. 2003 will drive you mad!!

Cubs Psychologist said:

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Oh..Ipod Shuffle

Lesson Learned-Alicia Keys ft. John Mayer
Two of America's Most Wanted-2 Pac ft. Snoop Doggy Dogg
Bed Intruder-Antoine Dodson
In the morning-Robin Thicke
What's Goin on-Marvin Gaye

berselius said:

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For what it's worth, Will Carroll no longer works for BP. He also burned a few bridges on his way out.

http://presscoverage.us/soapbox/the-geek-shall-inherit-on-baseball-bill-james-storytelling-the-simpsons/

JulieDiCaro said:

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I did not know that.

Thanks for the info.

gravedigger said:

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I read it, and felt like I was reading one of those 1940s crime novels where it reads like the person is having an argument with himself in his head, and you're supposed to sort out what is background chatter and what his real point was.

I still haven't figured it out. Guess I also just don't really care.

JulieDiCaro said:

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This courtroom always smells like dirty underwear. I can only hold my breath for so long!

Doc said:

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So...um...yeah...

Cubs Psychologist said:

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Dirty underwear...What kind of court room is this? Are in KY?

plamorte said:

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has to be Joliet...

JulieDiCaro said:

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Nope. Baby mama court downtown.

Doc said:

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In reference to #3...

my response is on my blog.

Doc said:

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#1...I've said this before...and I'll say it again...

If Sandberg doesn't get the gig, he isn't sticking around. I just don't see it. That was the first flag I threw when I say the Carroll post. I don't think Ryno is being pursued by any other team right now, but I think that's because most other teams don't believe he's available and that he'd never leave the Cubs. The sooner he doesn't get the Cubs job, the sooner he'll get a job somewhere else. And if he doesn't get another job, I think he'll just sit out next season.

With that being said, Quade has it.

Doc said:

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and #3

Dear younger and even dorkier Doc,

You're an idiot. Stay away from baseball. Go back to your first love, golf. You'll be better at it. Stop following the Cubs. It's not worth it.

But if you do choose to go down this path and follow the Cubs, then here are some words of advice:

1. At the times you become most hopeful...stop, breathe, and revert back to your usual, pessimistic self...especially in October of 2003.
2. Don't bother going to any Cubs/White Sox games (yes...they actually will play each other in real games in the future!)...they aren't worth the torment.
3. Stay away from any girl named Tammy. Trust me...you'll thank me. (This has nothing to do with the Cubs...but it's good advice nonetheless.)
4. Prozac. It hasn't been invented yet...but when it comes around, it will help you lead a productive life as a Cubs fan.

So, good luck and, if you have the opportunity to move to Wisconsin at some point...don't do it. You'll be stuck there for the rest of your life.

Love,
The much older, and slightly less dorky Doc

gravedigger said:

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Dear younger self,

The winning numbers for the biggest lottery win ever will be on ____, and the numbers are:

AndCounting said:

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"Dear younger me,

Excellent choice, cheering for the Cubs. You won't be disappointed. In a couple of years (1984) they're going to win it all. Also in 1989. And in 1998. And in 2003, 2007, and 2008. Some things to keep an eye on:

In '84, Leon Durham will make one of the more spectacular routine defensive gems you're ever going to see. Make a note of every ball hit to him. This will make you happy.

In '89, Will Clark will come up with the bases loaded against Greg Maddux. The ball he hits will eventually come back to earth, I swear.

In '98, Brant Brown catches everything hit near him, especially in Milwaukee in late August. Pay attention to all plays involving him.

In 2003 (yes, you live that long) not a thing goes wrong the entire season. It will be the easiest year of your Cubbie-loving life.

In 2007 and 2008 the Cubs go back-to-back to commemorate the time they did it 100 years before. It's going to be awesome.

I don't want you to get the idea that the Cubs won't be among the best teams in baseball the years in between those championships. They will. Every year the Cubs win between 85 and 115 games. Other teams just happen to get lucky every now and then. You'll learn to live with that disappointment. But, hey, at least you aren't a Yankees or Cardinals fan who never sees his team get remotely close to anything of significance.

You're in for a great ride, little Adam. Take notes so you can tell your children about the glorious legacy you're watching unfold.

Love,

Older you"

If younger me is clever enough to know what a big fat liar I continue to be, this letter will change my life.

HackWilson09 said:

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Dear Wee Little Hack:

It's early 1967. You are still a wrinkly fetus. You are already a Cubs fan, whether you like it or not. What you choose to do with this curse is up to you.

I would recommend this: One day in the future, you will see prison films on a type of TV called "cable". Midnight Express, Shawshank Redemption... There's also an interesting movie called Deliverance which you will be sorry to have watched. During these unsettling films, sometimes bad things happen to certain people, whether they are good people or not. In these films, you will see these victimized characters fighting against the horrible thing that is happening to them, and afterward they are both angry and ashamed.

So here is my advice for you. If you want to be at peace with the fact that you are a Cubs fan, here's what you need to do:

RELAX AND TRY TO ENJOY IT!

HackWilson09 said:

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I'm sorta sorry about what I just wrote. But this Trust Tree has me really telling it like it is.

1. Will is right, it's Quade with Ryno next to him -- or maybe Ryno coaching third, which I like.

3. Bartman's fault. I don't care what anybody says. If that's me, do you think that after waiting my whole life that I'm not gonna get my head in the game? Not only would I NOT go after the ball, I would be punching anyone else who tried. In the nuts.

Shuffle? Geez...

Parry the Wind, High Low by Frank Black
Emma by Richard Buckner
That Feel by Tom Waits
In the Jailhouse Now by The Soggy Bottom Boys
A Praise to Manjushri -- mantra by Sogyal Rinpoche

That's SHUFFLE for ya!!!

baturkey said:

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At 8 AM today, someone poisons the Kool-Aid. Do NOT drink the Kool-Aid. More instructions will follow. Cordially, Future Dwight.

JulieDiCaro said:

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ha.

i love future dwight almost as much as i love the lone dwigt.

flyball said:

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Dear Younger Flyball,

Spoiler alert. The Cubs suck, sorry, but they do. They will pretty much always suck, except for when they pretend to be good to then suck in spectacular fashion. One day you'll care that they suck, but by then it will be too late. Really, its not so bad, you get used to it, like allergies. Of course there will come a time when you find the equivalent of antihistamines for baseball and you'll realize how bad they were. But then the medicine goes away (it was making you anxious anyway) and the usual annoyance continues.

You'll be ok.

Oh, and get more sleep, seriously, sleep is good.

Older Flyball

oog of ulams said:

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Colony of Birchmen - Mastodon
Till the End - The Bruisers
Greenland Whale Fisheries - The Pogues
Alone Together - The Strokes
Girl/Boy - Aphex Twin

Teebob2000 said:

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Estan Lloviendo Lagrimas - Graciela Beltran
Dirty Work Goin' On - Little Joe Blue
Days Like This - Roger Eno
Won't Catch Me Cryin' - Willie Nelson
Houses In Motion - Talking Heads

Dmband said:

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Dear Younger DM-

Take the first dollar you have ever made. Invest it in a company called apple. Invest all future earnings in Apple. Times will get tough in the early 90's...sit tight. You'll be fine.

All of your favorite sports players have serious character flaws as people. Just know this going in.

Sometime in the summer of 1986, you will be 5 years old. Someone will tell your parents that they are going to take you to see the Cubs play the Mets at someplace called Wrigley Field. Dont go. Fake a sickness...lick your palms (it works, just ask Ferris. If you dont know who Ferris is, you will).

Good luck. And God Speed.

Ps. In september of 2010 some moron will try and set a bomb off in Wrigleyville. You'll be there. Find him and beat him mercilessly.

ELRaythar said:

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Dear younger self,

Oh man, savor that Wildcats championship in 1997. It'll be the last time you celebrate a team you root for winning anything of significance. Sure, the Suns will have moderate success in the playoffs and the Cubs will make the playoffs, but every time it will end in heartbreak. And just when you think "Oh, this time they're up by 20 or Only 5 more outs!" shiznit, that's your cue for impending suffering. Just a warning. Sure, it may pay off one day. Just not in your life time. Also, you aren't going to get fatter.

Hasta luegos amigoe,

Raythar

oog of ulams said:

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Dear small oog,

No eat uncooked uintatherium meat.

You truly,
oog

ELRaythar said:

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Ipod Cinq

J.A.R.- Green Day
Baby got Back- Sir Mix-A-Lot
Love Story- Taylor Swift
Shake it- Pitbull
Best I Ever Had- Drake

ELRaythar said:

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On the subject of 2003:

The players I think bought into the whole being cursed thing. I mean, of course the fans are on edge because we've seen it all before, but had the players just kept their cool and played the game the Cubs would have won the series. How much did Alou's tantrum and Prior's pointing affect Gonzalez? Imagine if they hadn't acted out, maybe AG doesn't feel as much pressure to perform (twss) and actually makes the damn DP. And of course, there is still game 7. Remember, 5-3 lead with the ace on the mound? All in all, poor Bartman. He took the brunt of over 90 years of frustration unfairly.

AndCounting said:

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Mystify - INXS
Sweet Caroline - Neil Diamond
Ridin' the Storm Out - REO Speedwagon
Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word - Elton John
Gossip in the Grain - Ray LaMontagne

flyball said:

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re: Community Project 3

I get asked about the grab more often than you'd think, although thankfully not as often as before, from people not in Chicago, who don't know a whole lot about the Cubs, and think they will sound smart by asking me. And they never believe when I say I don't blame him at all, that there were about 5 major things that happened that killed that game, and 30 minor ones. As if I'm the idiot and they know everything.

Its my least favorite question as a displaced Cubs fan. For that anoyance I blame the media in general and ESPN in particular.

canopygrl said:

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Dear Younger Canopygrl-

It is a boring year in 2007, stuck in the drab desert of Iraq working the night shift. Nothing better to do than go the eat breakfast and watch baseball! Being from Northern Virgina, you are too dumb to realize they (DC) got a team again. You'll starting understanding the game and begin enjoying it, most of all be cause the team you watch each time does really well. They will even make the playoffs! Then you'll go home and visit your dear friends in Peoria and they'll take you to Chicago for a day trip. "Hey, you like baseball" they say. "We'll drive you by Wrigley Field". "Hey, there is a game today, wanna go watch"? "Sure, what the heck"! The inning and the Cubbies are down 8 runs when you walk in the gate. But magic takes hold that day and inning 6 and 7 have got you hooked forever. Final score is 10-9 over the Rockies. Wrigley will always be a magical place to visit, bu frigging hell on the wallet. You'll continue to make wild excursions to see them play again, San Fran and most of all the entire series in DC (SWEEP). You'll realize that other clubs are far greater in meeting the needs of their teams and their fans (Nats Stadium, where I park for free at the Army post 2 blocks over). But you hold true and your deemed an fool, even by your loving husband...

Then several painful years later, in Iraq again. Watching the playoff again...Sans Cubs, the SF Giants line comes up and Fontenot is on the board; confused you look up the trade info and realize that he was traded two months ago along with everyone else you grew to love, except your beautiful Geo Soto (thank god he stopped over waxing those brows)...

PS- Your screwed, but met a lot of cool peeps along the way!

Older Canopygrl

berselius said:

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Oye Como Va - Santana
What do you do with a BA in English? - Avenue Q Soundtrack
Don't Think Twice, It's All Right - Dylan
Last Train - Arlo Guthrie
Bad Moon Rising - CCR

canopygrl said:

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mmm that was longer than I thought...

Anywho, CJ- funny story; I have a Soldier that is in Cook County Jail for aggravated use of a firearm (within city limits). I say he is screwed and is going to stay in jail for a while, whatcha think? Any insider connections to see if he is someone girlfriend yet!

JulieDiCaro said:

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ha--I wish. I'll help with that if you help me get personal service on a soldier inside Fort Hood!

canopygrl said:

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Mr Hassan? He'll get his...

JulieDiCaro said:

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no--a guy who beat my client to a bloody pulp and now is renegging on their divorce agreement.

Arkansascubfan said:

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Dear younger self, in 1987 you will move to town where you know nobody. You will decide to start watching baseball in the summer. Your two choices are WGN and WTBS. DO NOT GET SUCKED IN BY HARRY CAREY AND ANDRE DAWSON! Watch the Braves. Your life will be easier.

IPOD
No Rain-Blind Melon
Ain't No Sunshine-Bill Withers
Smoke Rings in the Dark-Gary Allen
Bat Out of Hell-Meatloaf
Turn the Page-Bob Segar

flyball said:

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I love hpw it boils down to a minor choice in tv channels

sloan peterson said:

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Dear Little Sloan:

Today your small town of Temple City just installed cable. After watching MTV for 3 hours straight, and marveling that they only had about 5 videos, but lots of little art films, you change the channel and hear a loud man, and watch a team from Chicago. This team will take the place of the Catholic religon that you refused confirmation on. You will learn patience, loss,faith, disappointment, and become so familar with Chicago, that when you get older and tell a coworker To go to Marshall Fields,and what stores to go see they want to know how many times you've been there.(correct answer-zero)Also,little Sloan, go to the local 4 year college-there is something called student loans. You can afford a 4-year college despite what your father tells you. Then you don't wait 30 years to get that degree. But Sloan,even being a Cubs fan, rooting for Sammy,etc. is still better than being a Dodgers fan.
Ipod 5
"Lucky"- Britany Spears
"In and out of Love"-Bon Jovi
"Love is the Drug"-Roxy Music
"Gossip Folks"-Missy Elliott
"Last Kiss"- Pearl Jam

PsyMar1 said:

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Dear younger me, age 6, circa 1994: It gets better over the next few years.

Baseball will come back. The Cubs still play baseball poorly, but they'll make the playoffs occasionally before reverting to form.

A minor-league baseball player by the name of Michael Jordan will go back to playing basketball for the Chicago Bulls: Watch him and treasure every moment.

People are still generally jerks, but at least they will, eventually, stop being blatant jerks to your face.

Go work on a jigsaw puzzle or play some tetris, and take your medication.

Oh, and tell your parents future me has been diagnosed with Asperger's, it'll explain a lot.

P.S. When the cat gets sick and her irises go red, I know it will be hard, but stay in your own bed with the poor cat. She's been there for you, you should be there for her.

PPS. Stretch your legs, arms, and back every day. Ask your parents how. You will thank me. And keep an eye on your weight; when it goes over 200, start watching what you eat.

PsyMar1 said:

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PPPS. When I said "watching what you eat", I meant "keeping track of how much you eat" -- I forgot how literal you are. The things you eat will not suddenly start running away; there will be no need to actually watch them.

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