We've all been on the giving or receiving end of an awkward-gift situation. You know, you're about to dump this guy, and he brings you flowers. Or it just happens to be December...and your overbearing, gossipy, talks-your-ear-off-when-you're-working-on-a-deadline coworker presents you with a gift card to Fluky's, and you had no intention of getting her a gift.
Awkward gift situations
The Christmas (or whatever you celebrate this time of year) season is
ripe for such weirdness -- it's a loaded holiday, and pressure is in
the air, even if you plan to spend the day at home, eating Cheetos and
watching "Medium" reruns in your underwear.
Remember to be gracious, above all else. Here's what to do in those sticky gift-giving times:
Remember to be gracious, above all else. Here's what to do in those sticky gift-giving times:
- The Surprise Gift:
This is when someone whom you weren't expecting a gift from, nor were you planning to buy for, springs a gift on you.
What to do: Say, "What a surprise! You shouldn't have! How thoughtful!" and follow up with a written thank-you card. You really don't owe the other person a gift. If you do feel such pressure, though, something small like a $5 candle will do the trick. Then you're sufficiently off the hook. - The Gift Imbalance:
You and Cousin Sally traded wish-lists, both equal in amount and value of luchre. You searched high and low for that special Magic Makeup Kit she wanted that was only carried by the Northbrook Macy's. You made the trip. You spent the money. Christmas Day, you open her package to find that Little Miss Cheapskate got you a $5 pair of thin, useless-in-Chicago-winter gloves.
What to do: Say a verbal "Thanks," move on, and ignore it. And yes, you do have to follow up with a written thank-you, but you don't have to overdo it. I'd leave out the words "thoughtful" and "effort," because neither were evident. Just scale back on the gifts to Sal next year, or ask her to skip the gift exchange altogether.
- "I'm Not Sure What to Get and I Don't Want to Send the Wrong Message":
You know what I mean ... it's Christmas in three days, you've been dating this guy for a month -- what's a love-struck gal to do? Too romantic looks like you're forcing a commitment; no gift looks like you don't care -- but you really, really like him!
What to do: Play it safe. A sweater. A gift card to an electronics store, but for a reasonable amount. You don't want to look like Michael Scott buying Ryan a $400 iPod. Twenty-five or fifty bucks should do it. Twenty-five is safe. A heartfelt card is nice, but avoid the L-word at all costs.
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