I’m no Kanye West, but I’ve never been gaga for Taylor Swift. She’s fine. My Tween likes her, but not obsessively, and that’s fine by me.
My Tween had a bad day at school and was upset about something hurtful a friend had said. This is the tip of the iceberg of mean girl behavior, I fear. When telling me about it in the car, my Tween got teary. Nothing I said was of any comfort. In fact, I’m pretty sure whatever I said was making the situation worse, which in turn made me more desperate to help, which means I tossed out more unhelpful words.
Then I realized Taylor Swift singing her song "Ours" on the radio, and while I thought about turning it off, I changed my mind and I turned it up. It includes the lyrics
“So don't you worry your pretty little mind
People throw rocks at things that shine.”
I told my tween that I think she shines very brightly, and that it's true that people use mean words like rocks. (
I had not taken the hint yet to shut up and was still trying to make it all better. Sometimes she needs the metaphor explained.) She uncrumpled just a little. By the next time the chorus came around, she was belting out the song, the tears were dry, and she was smiling.
I couldn’t ease the social angst of tweendom, but Taylor Swift sure did. Although I’m a smidge jealous of her effectiveness, I’m also glad that she helped. I'm grateful that her music soothed my girl's hurt feelings.
I guess Kanye was right, it's good to let Taylor finish.
Were there any songs that helped you make sense of the world as a tween? Do you have any go-to songs to pick you up after a rough day?