The Tyrannical King Still Reigns

Recently I met a woman from our former parish in the grocery store.  It was great to see her, but sad to hear that not much has changed in that parish.  It seems the tyranny of the "king" continues.

The pastor has no people skills and it seems odd to even type that.  How can you be a priest/pastor and not have people skills you might ask?  I have no idea.  Can it be taught in the seminary?  And why would anyone want to become a priest if, at minimum, they found it difficult to handle the many personalities of a parish?

And what is the archdiocese doing about it?  Nothing.  The woman told me that people have complained, but the king remains.  I know the answer to that one:  There's no one to replace him.

So at that parish, they struggle to carry on.  It is a shell of it's former self.  The school was closed years ago, the collection is way down, events and activities are infrequent because everything has to get by the king.  When an event does manage to get planned and executed, the king's critique is always at the ready to tear down the minions who worked their butts off to put it together.

My friend asked how my husband and I are doing.  I told her we found a new parish where we are currently singing and that we have been welcomed and we are very happy there.  "And," she added, "you're appreciated."

It seems like such a small thing, but those two words have meant everything to my husband and I and to our ministry.

As for the "kings," there's not a lot we can do.  Pray, I suppose.  Or leave the parish.

My husband and I left, and though it was painful at first, it was worth every moment to be where we are now.


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  • People skills are a gift, and a person with no skills can ruin any organization or enterprise.

    Priests are people too. Often they are simply sounding-boards for the disheartened, and become jaded in their mission. Most priests, though they live in community, are lonely souls. I would not want their job for all the treasures in...heaven.

    I have been "over-appreciated" when visiting different denominations, especially the mega-churches. It's like they are following a marketing plan, and in some cases, they are.

    It would be nice if the Catholic Church could find a balance. Try being single and a church member. If it is a suburban church you are not even on the radar screen, as it is all about the family.

    When it comes down to it it is between you and the real Presence and not a lack of presence unfortunately displayed by the clergy.

  • Well said! Thanks for stopping by!

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    I'm glad u & your husband are appreciated! I am sad for your friend ... but I also know a priest w/ people skills isn't always the proverbial bowl of pitless cherries, either ... I had one of those - now, his sermons were typical Catholic shallow no meat on the bones, and I had a few issues w/ the church itself - but hey! You can talk to Father! You can exchange pleasantries and etc.! And then ... he was swept up in the scandal. I tried to tell myself 'well you know Jean it's because he's friendly! it was misunderstood!' -- and then, he pled guilty ....

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