Be grateful today for the many blessings in your life: family (no returns anyway!), friends (they make up for the crazy family!), food (even if someone didn't make it just the way YOU like it) and the roof over your head (even if it might need a few repairs).
If you are shopping, please be nice to the sales people. They are giving up part of their holiday to serve you. And if they're not nice to you ... pray for them (and then shop somewhere else)!
And please don't let anyone be alone this Thanksgiving. Your family might be crazy to you, but they might seem hilarious and a real joy to someone who's alone. Besides they might behave because someone new is around.
I give you this unconventional prayer:
"May your stuffing be tasty,
May your turkey be plump,
May your potatoes and gravy have nary a lump.
May your yams be delicious and your pies take the prize,
and may your Thanksgiving dinner stay off your thighs!"