Parent Awards

I think it would be hilarious to have parenting awards. Parents deserve an award to commemorate all the crap they have to sift through (which can be knee deep at times).

9 times out of 10, my kids are hilarious to me. I have been especially amused by watching how they move through social situations. When they learned to share toys as toddlers, to care for others' feelings, and even machinations made up to avoid unwanted actions.

These should all should be celebrated.

Here are a few categories that sprang to mind. If you wish to nominate your child for one of these behaviors, share it with me and we can present the award to you. (Red Carpet may or may not exist).

Best Tasting Dinner that was picked at, moved around the plate, and not eaten

Best Tantrum (without rolling on the floor)

Best Tantrum (with rolling on the floor)

Best Screenplay Elaborate Lie Used to Cover Ones Actions

Best Animated Feature  as displayed on a wall in your house in crayon, marker, paint or other*

Best Choreography  A Maneuver to Avoid Unwanted Action (bath, homework, doctor visits)

Best Costume Design Honey, must you wear the red striped shirt with purple argyle sweater over green plaid pants?

Best Documentary Feature Best performance in home video

Best Music Your child moves past The Wiggles and you listen to your own music-which they like. (Christmas Music is exempt)

Best Makeup/Hairstyling Your two year old gets a hold of your lipstick or mascara. *May also be nominated for Best Documentary or Animated Feature)

Best Performance: (there are several categories)

1. Best she hit me first/he hit me first argument (includes S/he Started It)

2. Best "I didn't do it" Argument

3. Best "I did not eat that last cookie/piece of cake"

4. Best "I'm sick and can't go to school today" performance

5. Best "I did my homework at school" argument

6. Best stubborn refusal to do something asked of them

Best Actress/Actor

A. In a Drama (slamming doors, pouting, cursing optional)

B. In a Comedy (intentional or not)

Ay, Mama!

Filed under: Parenting

Tags: parenting awards

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