Kids DO Say the Darndest Things

I love to see how kids percieve the world. Words can be so literal. Idioms and turns of phrase are totally lost on them and can lead to hilarious questions. At times,  their simplest comment can show you the world in an entirely new way.

From my own family: My Dad kept a mental list of what he called "Bird's Words". "I'm sopping tired" was one. Why not? why is something only sopping wet, and what is sopping anyway?

"It overflooded" in reference to a minor flood. It works.

Zoe: "Whatcha making Dadda?" Scott replies, "Chilli." Zoe thinks, then asks, "Why are you making cold?"

"I stubbed my knee". Letting the knee in on some toe action here.

Please enjoy some comments parents have sent in of funny things they or their kids said:

 Our own Laura L: Last night I took NyQuil. As Steve and I were talking about how I was talking in my sleep and that I had some crazy dreams, Atia said, "Don't give me nightmare medicine. I don't want to take any." We couldn't help but laugh... Atia heard NyQuil as nightmare. Not far from the truth since sometimes it's a bit hallucinogenic. :)

Lisa H: I thought the Our Father said, Our father who aren't in heaven and I remember asking my Mom, if he isn't in heaven--where is he?  

Alyssa heard lactose intolerence as Black Toast intolerence and thought duh, who likes black toast anyway?

Amy O: One time when Jack was about 3, he came in from outside and was covered in dirt. I said to him " wow, you're filthy" and he replied, " no I am not, I am Jack"

Nanette M: When Frannie was little and would cut herself or scrape her knee she would say “I’ve got bleed”.

Julia N: Peter says the best stuff all of the time: “Is God Santa’s Mom?”

Today Lily said “today is Tuesday.  Don’t you remember we were off school yesterday b/c a very important man who is black had his birthday” and Peter said “I know when Jesus’ birthday is”.

One day he had friends over and said "oh no, the girls have Samuel up there and when I play with them they dress me up like a girl and call me Lucy. After our snack we should get weapons and go up and get him."

Tina S: Charlotte called the Love Seat the "Lovin Seat" she also referred to our town as "Mouse Prospect"
Our neighbor told his daughter that when the Ice Cream truck rings the bell, it means he's out of Ice Cream. A week later the girl complained, Oh man, he's always out of ice cream!"  

Chuck S: Even high school students can say some pretty funny things:  

“President Lincoln issued the Emasculation Proclamation”

“Sir Francis Drake circumcised the world with a 30 foot clipper”

 “The trench warfare in WW I was awful because they kept passing gas at each other.”

Amy L: Renz:  Can we see dinosaurs at the zoo? Rich:  No...they're extinct. Renz:  Oh.  When they're done stinking, can we see them?

Greta, after the mechanics of sex are explained:  "Do you do that in a doctor's office?" So many comebacks..."Sure, if you are the doctor's favorite nurse."  And, "Only if they make you wait a long time."  

Keri G: Yesterday I was discussing gentlemanly behavior with the boys. I mentioned that some men open car doors for their wives or girlfiends. Dylan saif "ya, but mostly just for girlfriends"

Erin T: When I mentioned that my wedding dress probably wouldn't fit me anymore, my son asked, "Why? How tall were you when you got married?"

Robin O: DURING A WRESTLING MATCH WITH MIKE THE OTHER DAY GAVIN ASKED MIKE TO "PAUSE" THE GAME BECAUSE HE WASN'T WINNING....WE LIKED THE IDEA OF SAYING "PAUSE" WHENEVER LIFE WASN'T WORKING OUT JSUT RIGHT.

PENELOPE WHEN SHE WA YOUNGER ASKED IF WE COULD REPLACE A DEAD BUGS BATTERIES TO BRING IT BACK TO LIFE.

Joan M:  I loved a comment my sweet niece, Kathy, said when she was a littlie kid: She called her slippers "skippers" because she loved skipping down the long hallway in them!

Melissa M: Grace, on her third birthday: remember, mama, when you were a baby and I carried you around?

Beth S:  Joseph had a little trouble in the fall when preschool first started. He pushed another classmate. I wanted to use the ps terminology and tried to explain "Joseph it is not ok to push or hit your friends". He looked at me and replied "he was not my friend".

 

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  • Oh, so funny!!! I have an addition. It's not mine, it's a story a patient told me, so I'm changing one of the names for confidentiality's sake:
    Their family has two daughters, Grace & Emma. Their family prays before dinner each night. One night, Grace was at swim practice. They sat down to dinner without her. Mom: Okay, sit down, let's say grace. Emma: Mom, tonight could we say Emma instead?
    Poor second child!

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