Everyone has heard a version of this story. Maybe it happened to a friend of a friend. Or a cousin's neighbor's niece. But everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, has heard of someone who adopted a child and shortly afterward became pregnant (often with twins). So I wasn't surprised that from the moment I arrived home with Dylan, "Womb-Watch 2009" began.
All throughout our adoption process, we had many friends and family members insist that I would get pregnant before we received "The Call." When that didn't happen they just switched the deadline to before the end of the first year of Dylan being home. The first few months were the worst. If I complained about gaining a few pounds, the instant response was: "Do you think you're pregnant?" If I mentioned I was feeling a little bloated, they thought there was a definite chance I could be pregnant. If I said I was feeling tired, I definitely must be pregnant. Never mind the fact that I was still jet-lagged and adjusting to parenting a toddler!
Living in the suburbs didn't help matters any, either. Anywhere you go here, you are surrounded by pregnant women. The talk is constantly about babies, pregnancy and labor. There are very few lonelier things than being a young, childless couple living in the suburbs. Everyone is always on the lookout for a pending stork announcement. To further the baby obsession, this was the year Octomom, John and Kate Plus 8, and 18 Kids and Counting became household names. Everyone had babies on the brain, and the media pounced.
The obsession endures to this day. Open any tabloid magazine and you see several stories speculating about whether this or that actress has a baby bump, complete with an arrow or circle outlining the "telltale" area of the formerly emaciated celebrity that gained a well-needed 5 or 10 pounds. Mariah Carey, Fergie, Jennifer Garner and Kate Middleton (Prince William's girlfriend) are just some of the celebs who have recently been the target of media pregnancy speculation.
Of course, I am not a celebrity, but after going through my own personal "womb-watch" period, I began sympathizing with them in a way I never thought I would. The words "Just watch, now that Dylan's home and you're relaxed, you'll get pregnant" would come out of the mouths of just about everyone I talked to. I know they had nothing but the most sincere good will towards me, but having another baby on top of the one I had recently adopted and was just now starting to really get to know was not my idea of a good time. I couldn't imagine going to a hospital to visit a friend who had just popped out her first baby and was still recovering, telling her "I bet you'll be pregnant again within just a few months," and expecting her to greet these news with an enthusiastic smile.
The truth was, I didn't want to get pregnant. I had waited so long to have a child at home I just wanted to enjoy having Dylan home and bask in every little detail of him for a few years. I still don't want to get pregnant. Would I like to have another child in the near future? Yes, I would. Another adopted child. For now, though, I am thoroughly enjoying being the mother of one, and if for some reason we are unable to adopt again, I think I would still feel like the luckiest mom in the world.