The "Stay-At-Home-Mother"

Before I had kids, I remember thinking about the stay-at-home-mothers;
what do they do all day?  Babies sleep, eat and poop; what else is there
to do with the rest of the time?  I imagined it would be something like
this: 

Wake up. 
Feed the kid.
Watch Oprah and The
View. 
Feed the kid. 
Eat chocolates. 
Put the kid for a
nap. 
Take a shower. 
Feed the kid. 
Watch an afternoon
soap. 
Put the kid for a nap. 

Was this a typical
stay-at-home-mom day?  Please, this is ridiculous.  I was never to
become one of them.  I was so wrong.

We waited a long time to
have Lucia.  I got married at 23 and Lucia wasn't born until I was 30. 
My plan was to work full time, hire a nanny, and continue with my
"normal" life.  The new baby was not going to change me, or change the way
I thought my life was going to be. Wrong again.  Lucia was born in
September of 2006 and since that moment, I became a stay-at-home-mom. 
Yep, I became one of them.

At the beginning, it was a honeymoon. 
I loved being with Lucia 24/7.  She was such a good baby.  It was a
true blessing.  We did the playgroups, Gymboree, and lunch with other Mommies.  It was awesome.  Of course, some days were better than
others, but in general, it was a lot of fun and I was truly enjoying
being a stay-at-home-mom.  First steps. First words. First smiles.  I
didn't miss a single thing.  I felt very lucky, since I know not
everyone can afford to stay home with the kids.

When Lucia turned
20 months, Joaquin was born.  It was hard to have two kids under the
age of two at the same time.  I was losing my temper due to the lack of
sleep.  One baby was taking a nap, the other one was awake.  One baby was
finally sleeping through the night, the other one was nursing through the night.  I was tired. I was so tired.  Need I say more?  It was
tough.

Shortly after Joaquin turned one, I realized I needed
some outlets.  Being a stay-at-home-mom was more difficult than what I
expected it to be; especially after baby number two.  I know I
didn't want to go back to work full time, but I also knew I
couldn't do the stay-at-home-mom thing 24/7.  This is when I started my
mini projects, the mini outlets that have made me a better mother for my
kids.  I am happy to report that between the spinning class that I
teach, the Ay Mama! column, and the
cooking classes, I have found the perfect balance for the kids and I. 
I've managed to juggle the house, the husband, the kiddos,
and the projects.  I am probably the busiest I've been in my entire
life, but achieving this balance has also made me a happier and a better
mother.  If Mama is happy, everyone in the house is happy. 

So, what is a stay-at-home-mom after all?  Do I get to
watch Oprah every day?  I wish!  Today, my perspective has changed.  I
applaud the Mothers that can stay with their children 24/7 and  are fully
committed to their kids.  I also applaud the Mothers that work all day
and still have the energy and passion to come home and dedicate time to
be with their little ones.  I guess that, whatever we do as Mothers, the
important thing is to remember the following:  if we are happy, our kids will be too. 

Since I still get to bake (not because I have to, but because I LOVE it!).  I'll be sharing with you my Abuela's lime bars.  To die for!

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Ingredients:

-16 oz. unsalted butter
-2 cups all purpose flour
-1/2 cup confectioners sugar
-4 eggs
-2 cups granulated sugar
-6 Tbsp. lime juice
-1 Tbsp. all purpose flour
-1/2 tsp. baking powder
-1 cup chopped nuts

Comments

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  • First, your blog is awesome. It's always entertaining. So yeah, nice work!

    Second, they're lemon bars with no lemon? Only lime juice?

    And last, what kinds of nuts did you use and did you toast them first?

  • In reply to drewkent23:

    Funny you mention the fact that it is not lemons, but lime juice. In Spanish "limon" is lime and "lima" is "lemon" - Maybe I should change it to "Lime bars" :-) The point is that these bars are delicious!

    I used chopped walnuts for this recipe.

    Thanks for reading the blog!

  • I've worked ever since I was 14 years old, and being a SAHM is by far the most difficult job I've ever had...and I only have one child! Of course I absolutely love it, but I can't even BEGIN to imagine how much harder it will be when we have a second child!!! Loved the entry!

  • In reply to KhadineKubal:

    Thanks Khadine! Yes, IT IS VERY DIFFICULT!!! Probably the hardest thing we've done so far, right? Enjoy being the Mother of one until baby number two arrives :-)

  • In reply to KhadineKubal:

    I love you blog, for me is like a picture, a flashback of my life, I have 4 daughters, the first when I was 21 and the last at 26. It was so hard to be a mother 24/7 but it was great . As you said, I was in every important event, I enjoy every minute of their lives and finally, cry a lot when they leave home. That moment is like a tsunami..... everything looks so dark and empty.

    For me, the difficult part, but not impossible, was to find a balance between kids and husband. I always remember what my father told me the first day I hold my first daughter, Mariliana in my arms, he told me "never forget you was wife first than a mother" so I learned the most important lesson in my whole life that date, his best advice so I never forgot his word. I recognize that many mothers abandon her husband because all kids problems, bad, very bad. Remember kids will leave and husband will stay.

    For all that mothers who think staying home with kids is just a way to put all their future in the trash, wrong, is the most valuable decision a mother can made. Is going to be difficult but the better way to grow up with your kids and become a lovely mother.

    When kids leave home and start their own lives you will find in each one a piece of Mom and a piece of Dad and all of them will be a better Mom and a better Dad because of parents time and dedication.

  • In reply to MAYRA:

    Mayra, thank you very much for the words of wisdom. I try to make time for everything, and it is definitely not easy. The two kids, my husband and my "part time jobs" (plus the house and everything that goes with it) it is a hard job. Thank you for reading our blog!

  • In reply to NinaGoyco:

    thank you for your blog and to make me laugh with your things...... que Dios te bendiga...

  • In reply to NinaGoyco:

    Great, GREAT entry!!! So true, Nina! I feel just like you did. I'm looking now for outlets. I agree...sometimes more outlets maintain more order at home. And yes, being a mommy is the HARDEST thing I have ever done. People may tell you that, but you never realize it until you are doing it!

    Your recipe looks yum yum!!!

  • In reply to anitarudite:

    Definitely the toughest job there is! The outlets have been very helpful, I hope you get to find something too :-) Thanks for reading!

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