After a pretty embarrassing trip to her grandparents in Puerto Rico where she would run away at the mere sight of her Lolo (her grandfather) and spent five days trying to go back into my uterus, we are looking for ways to turn our 2 year old into a social being. She has been doing Gymboree Music and Painting classes with much success but, in both sessions,I'm sitting right next to her. I want her to run, be free, be with other peers.
So I signed her up for a Baby Ballet class in Bucktown where she would have to follow the teacher as I watch behind the glass. I danced ballet for more than a decade and have no interest to do it again, so I was thrilled at the prospect of sitting this one out. Not a fat chance, amiga.
From the get go the nice woman at the desk adviced me to go in with Amelia, since it was her first time and she's not even 2 and half. I thought she had seen some unwillingness in my daughter but when class started, the room door was left open. Three Moms including myself had to sit inside, by the ballet bar, and eventually drag our girls to follow the teacher. The Dads stayed right by the door, with toddlers trying to pull them in.
I took a look at myself in the mirror and thought "what the heck was I thinking". I started dancing at 7 years old when my Mom, a former teen dancer herself, signed me up. I had the emotional and mental capacity to decide if I liked it and I loved it. My daughter is still trying to figure out what food she likes. Am I expecting to much from a 2 year old? Am I trying to push too hard for her to socialize? Is she just a regular 2 year old and too young to even grasp the concept of follow the leader? Should I have more patience and maybe by week 8 of baby ballet, she could actually dance to the music and not to the beat of her own drum? Suggestions will be appreciated.
I have to admit I'm probably scared that she inherits my fear of abandonment. I cried every morning from pre k to fifth grade because I missed my Mommy. I went to therapy at 13 because I wanted to be more independent from my parents. I remember how hard it was to have those insecurities and I don't want Amelia to suffer like that. Yeah, I know, I'm thinking too much. She is her own little person and she will be like she will be.
For now, I sent her to soccer with her Dad who sounded just as frustrated by the lack of participation from our girl. But since he is older and wiser than me, he says we need to stick it out and that she will get it. Hence, he's in charge of taking her from now on. Ay Mama!