1. Atheist – No belief in god
2. Atheist – Lack of belief in god
3. Atheist – We don’t know how the universe began, but we’re really sure it wasn’t that guy
4. Atheist – Far more interested in glorifying life than glorifying death.
5. Atheist – At a certain age belief in Santa is cute. At a certain age it’s not.
6. Atheist – Do you believe in Zeus? That’s how we feel about your god.
7. Atheist – Don’t believe in any gods but your own? We simply take it one religion further.
8. Atheist – Because god sending himself to be sacrificed to himself in order to save us from himself (but only if you believe it) seems a bit irrational.
9. Atheist – We don’t hang garlic on our doors just in case vampires are real.
10. Atheist – Because evolution is a successful scientific theory while creationism is a failed hypothesis advocated by idiots and frauds.
11. Atheist – A belief that jealous men creating a jealous god is the more likely scenario.
12. Atheist – The arrogant belief that the universe wasn’t created especially for us, or that we have a personal relationship with an all-powerful being who occasionally grants us favoritism.
13. Atheist – Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. (Sagan)
14. Atheist – That which can be asserted without evidence can be dismissed without evidence. (Hitchens)
15. Atheist – Integrity in thought is worth more than blindness in obedience.
16. Atheist – When strength of character dictates that the rejection of a morally repulsive myth isn’t a choice, but a necessity.
17. Atheist – Rather than pick and choose in a crappy cafeteria, we find a better restaurant, and another, and another, and another.
18. Atheist – There has never been a word of god. Only words of men claiming to speak for god. And that’s a big difference.
19. Atheist – “We don’t know” has never meant, and will never mean, it was magic. Ignorance proves nothing.
20. Atheist – Immoral because we don’t faithfully subscribe to a book that condones slavery and murder or believe that everyone else will be burned forever. But we still love you.
21. Atheist – In realizing that we made a mistake in making gods, we drowned them.
22. Atheist – The tide goes in, the tide goes out, we can explain that. That would be the gravitational pull of the moon, and to a smaller extent, the pull of the sun. Google it!
23. Atheist – Science represents an advancing knowledge of the universe while god represents a retreating ignorance.
24. Atheist – Every supernatural monster winds up being some jerk in a mask.
25. Atheist – Pay attention to the man behind the curtain
26. Atheist Humanist – We rape and kill everyone we want, which is no one.
27. Atheist Humanist – Be good for goodness sake. That’s all you need my friend.
Note - Some of these definitions were inspired if not directly quoted by:
Neil deGrasse Tyson
Wizard of Oz
And some unknown or forgotten sources
-James Kirk Wall
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