Posts in category "National Politics"

Census Totally Screws Dems, Not Just In Illinois

Like a number of “blue” states, it appears people are fleeing Illinois like it was on fire and heading to states with questionable school board decisions, warmer climates and compelling roadside tourist attractions. As a result, Illinois stands to lose one House seat to the Bible belt; we’ll be divided into 18 House districts instead... Read more »

Harry Reid's Stupidity Spells End for DADT

What do you do when you have a bill, enough Senators in negotiations to send the “yes” votes right to the 60 you’d need to pass it and every gay rights activist in the country holding a bottle of the most expensive champagne you can find? Well, if you’re Harry Reid, you dash their hopes... Read more »

Dems Fail to Compromise, Screw Themselves Into Compromise

Last week, Democrats in the House saved a few precious weeks of talking points by voting to extend the Bush tax cuts…but only to “middle class” Americans and not to evil rich people. Sensing that they were getting dangerously close to maintaining their backbone in the face of adversity and revealing their true ideological beliefs,... Read more »

He's In the Majority, He Can Cry if He Wants To

You just probably cost your party major losses in the midterm election and narrowly won re-election to the majority leader position against the wailing protestations of effective Democrats everywhere. What mature activity is next for you? Well, if you’re Nancy Pelosi, the next step is calling the man who’s about to take your gavel a... Read more »

Dear TSA, I'm Just Not That Into You

Back on Monday, I totally didn’t blog because I was flying back from Boston, which is a nightmare airport only slightly worse than O’Hare, and I say that only because my flight was delayed both coming and going. Also, while I find the Chicago accent super hot in a man-in-blue-collar-uniform sort of way, the Boston... Read more »

Melissa Bean Says The Long Goodbye

This only took for-f***ing-ever. Republican Joe Walsh beat Rep. Melissa Bean (D-Ill.) in the photo-finish contest in Illinois eighth congressional district–the vote counting was completed on Tuesday. Bean holds a press conference Wednesday in Schaumburg to discuss the race and Walsh has one in Washington at the Republican National Committee headquarters. If I were Melissa... Read more »

Bristol and The Situation and Something About Sex

I don’t know if I learned anything from this video except: (1) Damn, that’s really awkward and (2) I suspect that the Situation cannot actually memorize lines, which explains why everything he says revolves, in some way, around the words “The Situation.” (3) I don’t know for sure, but I think the Magnums are wishful... Read more »

A Dancing With the Stars Public Service Political Announcement

Attention Palin voters who are f***ing with my show: Look, I get it. Bristol Palin is the only Palin you can currently vote for, and, to some, booting her off the show prior to her sell-by date would have seemed like a vast left-wing conspiracy to hinder the entire Palin family regardless of political weight.... Read more »

Dems To Make Trouble For Mark Kirk?

Weirdly, it seems that Illinois’ official process for certifying the Senator-elect will prevent Mark Kirk from taking his seat in Washington until well after the lame duck session has started. I could be outrageously outraged with outrage on this particular subject, but if you didn’t expect some monkey business was in store for the Republican... Read more »

Nancy Pelosi And The Congressional Underpants Gnomes

Damn, I love this picture. Pay attention because I’m about to give you a lesson in how to turn temporary setbacks in to permanent political losses. You may not want this lesson, but I don’t care, because it explains why a political junkie like is practically wetting herself with joy at the thought that, despite... Read more »