Melissa Bean Says The Long Goodbye

This only took for-f***ing-ever.

Republican Joe Walsh beat Rep. Melissa Bean (D-Ill.) in the
photo-finish contest in Illinois eighth congressional district--the
vote counting was completed on Tuesday. Bean holds a press conference
Wednesday in Schaumburg to discuss the race and Walsh has one in
Washington at the Republican National Committee headquarters.

If I were Melissa Bean, I would use that dogged insistence I so clearly possess to convince my fellow Democrats that I'd lost to the actual Joe Walsh, member of the Eagles, REO Speedwagon and that weird band that Ringo Starr put together when he ran out of cash, rather than the other Joe Walsh with the melt-y face, who even Republicans aren't that into.

I know Congress needs less men who fake bake, not more, but you can't deny the public what they want, Melissa. You can only make this seem less painful historically.


Leave a comment
  • I can't figure out (especially Quinn's) need for a concession from an opponent. Military members are entitled to have their votes counted, and the deadline was yesterday.

    Maybe the state can get Kirk's election certified and Rollie out of there. At least that has some real consequences.

Leave a comment