Hair Struggles

Hair can change a person. Long, short, curly, straight, blond, brunette, red, green, the list is endless. Anyone who has ever watched makeover day on America's Next Top Model, knows that women are VERY attached to their hair. As a cosplayer, I wear a lot of wigs. So, I get to sport different looks through costumes all the time. I think I love wigs so much because they look great, and you can change your style in the matter of seconds. In real life, my hair is not that easy to manage. I've gone through a lot of hair changes through the years, and African American hair can be tricky.

(My various hairstyles and wigs since I've started cosplaying)

For as long as I can remember, I've been getting chemical relaxers to straighten my hair. That was until my hair got badly damaged, and started to break. In 2004, I decided to cut it all off and start fresh. I grew my hair naturally for 2 years before I caved and decided to get it straightened again.

Loving the afro!

Natural hair back in 2006

Stress, heat, and chemicals have become too much on my hair yet again, and it's time for me to make another decision. With a hair appointment looming in a few weeks, I had to decide on whether I want to continue with the chemical relaxer, or let this stuff grow out. Looking back on pictures of myself from those 2 years, and finding blogs and youtube videos of black women who have made the decision to cut their relaxers and go natural, has inspired me!

I'm not putting those chemicals in my hair anymore! Hopefully, I can stick with it this time. My hair was stronger and healthier when it was growing naturally.  One of the first things I thought was, "what will my boyfriend think?" The natural days were before we met, and he'd only seen pictures of me from back then. I know he loves my hair now, and I want him to still find me attractive. After a nice long talk, he said he'd love whatever hair I decide to have. Then my thoughts went to my costumes (of course)! I'm working on a new Uhura costume, that would be incorporating my straightened hair, but once I cut my hair, I'll have to buy a wig for that costume.

So this is going to be an interesting hair transition. It'll be a few months before I cut off the relaxed hair completely, because I want to get a decent amount of new growth first. But I'm very excited! It'll be a liberating hair transformation.

Read Part 2 of my "Hair Struggles"


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  • I've done the complete chop/do over a few times, due to very BAD 80's perms and teasing! LOL

    Your natural hair looks adorable! Good luck hon!

  • In reply to BookSavvy:

    I've done it before, and I know I can do it again. It'll just be a HUGE change once I cut it! Eep! My hair IS starting to break though, so this is a good choice.

    lol @ your 80s perm :)

  • In reply to BookSavvy:

    don't ever relax or straighten your hair. women kill to have beautiful curls and if you have them naturally you should keep it. also....i see girls with horribly damaged hair every day because of straightening/'s so disgusting and they will end up bald in a few years if not sooner. leave your hair natural because I'm sure it's beautiful that way, also what your boyfriend thinks of your hair should never come into's Your head! :)

  • In reply to JMilk:

    I've been getting relaxers since I was in grammar school. So it's hard to imagine my hair any other way. When I chopped it all off the first time, it was different, but I fell in love with it once it started growing out. My hair is just so sensitive, so I gotta go back to my roots! (pun intended lol) I worried what my boyfriend would think because he's never seen my hair any other way, and I do value his opinion. But I have to do what's best for my hair :)

  • In reply to Nash:

    I totally agree with the fact that you need to do what's best for your hair. Your hair looks like it was just as beautiful natural as it is straightened, it just is a different look.

  • In reply to Nash:

    I talked to my stylist last night about it, and I'm super excited about doing this. I've been reading stuff online all weekend about women who made this choice about their hair. I know this probably isn't a big deal to some people, but any black woman knows how tough of a choice it is. I'm happy to have supportive friends, thanks for your comments guys!

  • In reply to Nash:

    I think you're a beautiful gal and no matter what hair style you go for, you'll look great! :)

    I'm not a big fan of going hog-wild with chemicals, in fact, I'd never colored my hair until last summer when I had it done for my cousin's wedding. (though I am gonna get it colored again just before the Whoniverse shoot next month) But natural hair is the healthiest, though sometimes it can be tough to agree with what nature hands us!

    And hey, an excuse to get another wig is always good right? ;)

  • In reply to KnitChick:

    I think it's hard to get used to your hair, when it's been a certain way all your life. All this positive talk about the change has me really excited though! It's going to be a different routine for me for sure, and it'll get kinky and probably tangle lol. I miss it though.

    What color are you dyeing your hair for the photoshoot?

  • In reply to KnitChick:

    good luck on whatever you go with, be it natural or perm i can tell you for sure you are a beautiful girl and your smile & personality out shines any style you chose!!! So go for it & do your thing girl!!!!

  • In reply to SharonR:

    Thanks so much! I'm very motivated to do this now. I found a bunch of old pictures on my laptop of me with my natural hair, and it was pretty cute. As long as I keep it moisturized, it'll be easy to manage in the mornings too!

  • fb_avatar

    Hi beautiful naturals!! I had a very challenging and hard time transitioning. I did the big chop in Dec 2009 and 2 years later my hair was still brittle, DRY, damaged and broken off badly. I finally understand how to take care of my hair! Check out my you tube channel

    look at my pictures and see where I am today. I am also doing a MSM and Biotin challenge for 1 months.

    The key for me was to stop the wash and go's, i started doing protective styles and moisturizing my hair twice a day, I also make my own hair butter. I found out I was protein sensitive which was another factor of hair breakage.

    Good luck to everyone!!!

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