Crystal's Story: The Blessing of a Daughter

October is LGBT History Month. To honor transgender people and their unique histories, I will be featuring transgender people and parents of transgender children all month long. Through sharing their stories, I hope to raise awareness of this amazing population of people who still struggle for basic human rights.

By Crystal Posser-Craver, parent of a trans daughter and blogger at ActiMom

"It's a boy!" was announced in the operating room as my second child was delivered via c-section on the last day of November in 2015. I couldn't be happier. Since the birth of my daughter in 1998 I had said I didn't want a middle child and having 1 girl and 1 boy would be perfection.

Over the next 2 years I took the doctor's word for it. I mean she was the doctor and, therefore, more knowledgeable than I in matters such as gender. After all, I am just a mom. My child was dressed in cutesy little boy outfits and received boyish haircuts and played with things little boys liked.

It wasn't until my husband got custody of his 2 children and we needed to have a counselor in our home that the first BIG sign occurred. The counselor asked each child what they wanted to be when they were all grown up. My youngest child announced they were going to be a mommy. Well, we corrected them and side "you mean a daddy". Nope ... definitely a mommy and then went on to show us how big they wanted their breasts to be.

From there we got more signs, such as being interested in their sister's toys, music, clothes, makeup, nail polish, friends, etc. Still we didn't push stuff. We still bought the boyish clothes and gave the boyish haircuts, etc. We never denied requests for traditionally "girl" things though... no matter what it was.

It would take another 7 years for Rose to tell us that she wasn't a boy. I wish I would have asked her sooner. She was always a happy and sweet child, but she has become even happier. Since April 13, 2015 she has lived her true life at home, in school and out in the world.

I have always been proud of my children, but I am honored to have been blessed with a daughter who is so strong and so brave.
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 Special thanks to Mary Tyler Mom who inspired this unique and beautiful way of honoring LGBT History Month.
photo credit: Handmade Butterfly Mobile via photopin (license)

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