Sequels. They’re never as good as the originals are they? I shied away from writing a second Grey’s Anatomy review for dudes because people really loved the first one and I didn’t want a Taken 2 situation on my hands. Anyways, people kept asking me to do it again even though I think this is a horrible idea but hey, if Sandra Bullock can make a Speed 2, I can write this. So here we go: Grey’s Anatomy seasons 4 and 5.
We last left off with the ugly crying Asian doctor getting married to Black doctor. In a twist no one saw coming (cough*sarcasm*cough), it didn’t happen. In real life, black doctor hates gays and it caused him to be kicked off the show. So ugly crying Asian doctor cried again because they didn’t get married. Renee Zellweger doctor(Merideth) and ugly crying Asian doctor go on her honeymoon anyway because that's what happens when you're each other's people.
Ok, so we are introduced to some characters this year because the same 10 people can’t keep fucking each other without it getting weirder than it already is. So we have Callie who is pretty hot but it’s thrown in our face a bazillion times that she is a bigger girl. I think the producers wanted us to know that not everyone is skinny so they gave us her. I think that’s kind of nice. We also have a new group of interns because our group of interns are now residents. Well, everyone except for George (the kind of cool and funny guy) because he failed his doctor test. One of the interns is named Lexie and she just so happens to be Meredith’s half-sister. She was the girl from ‘Not Another Teen Movie’. This isn’t really important but Meredith treats her like shit. There’s a blonde heart surgeon named Doctor Hahn (who is just the least delightful person on TV ever) who takes over for black doctor here. She’s a lesbian. Well, maybe not… I’ll get to that.
It doesn’t take long for Lexie to fuck someone and of course it’s Alex. George and BBW doctor fuck too. I think George fucked everyone except ugly crying Asian doctor and Izzie (Knocked Up blonde doctor) but don’t worry he gets it in with her too. George’s dad dies so George runs off and gets married to BBW doctor. Anyways, George cheats on BBW Doctor with Izzie. (See told you).
Meanwhile our protagonist, Meredith, is still butt hurt over McDreamy so she’s celibate now. McDreamy is dating a nurse who is much hotter than Renee Zellweger but he is still infatuated with her. BBW doctor finds out George cheated with Izzie and then starts fucking both McSteamy and Dr. Hahn Lesbian doctor at the same time. (Is doctor Hahn a lesbian? I never figured this out?) There’s a medical trial in there somewhere and Renee Zelwegger and McDreamy just start killing people but it’s just a plot device to have them fall for each other again. An ambulance crashes, a kid gets stuck in concrete, an apartment explodes, and a dude cuts his own foot off in the ER. Oh and the plot device works and McDreamy and Meredith get back together when she puts a bunch of candles on a plot of land.
Cut to season 5 and ugly crying Asian doctor is impaled by an icicle. Nope, you sure as fuck didn’t read that wrong. She’s impaled by an icicle. It’s the dumbest fucking thing ever. Anyway, she’s saved by a military doctor who seems pretty cool. (He’s the lead character from Journeyman, the awesome NBC show that got canceled.) The nurse that McDreamy used to fuck stabs him in the hand with a scalpel, and the hospital starts to suck. It goes from the number 1 hospital in the world to 12. Oh and another lesbian doctor is introduced named Arizona.
Jesus fuck these reviews are long. Ok I’ll wrap up season 5 the only way I know how: George passes his doctor test, Izzie fucks Alex again, Alex fucks some crazy broad who thinks she is pregnant, there’s a 12 person kidney transplant in here that is just impossible, BBW doctor is still fucking McSteamy, McSteamy is fucking Lexie even though they try to avoid it for three episodes, Journeyman fucks ugly crying Asian doctor, I think Izzie fucks the ghost of the dad from Supernatural - it was really weird, McDreamy and Renee Zellweger get engaged in an elevator, a super cute doctor named Saddie is introduced and gets naked so the interns can cut out her appendix for training or something, Journeyman and Ugly Crying Asian doctor break up, BBW doctor thinks Saddie wants to fuck her but fucks Arizona lesbian doctor, Izzie gets a brain tumor, BBW doctor gets her trust fund pulled by her dad when he finds out she likes the vag, Izzie and Alex steal McDreamy and Meredith's wedding and get married out of nowhere. Oh, and GEORGE FUCKING DIES. THIS IS BULLSHIT AND I DON’T WANT TO WATCH THIS ANYMORE.
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