Sorry, Not Sorry. Stop Apologizing

Sorry, Not Sorry. Stop Apologizing

Donald Sterling is sorry for being racist. The NBA is also sorry that Donald Sterling is racist and wants to apologize to Magic Johnson for his remarks during a recent interview with the silver fox himself Anderson Cooper. (AIDS!!!) Don Jones, a player for the Dolphins, tweeted, “OMG” after the first openly gay player in the NFL was drafted and kissed his boyfriend. He has since apologized. The Weather Channel is very sorry for a tweet too. Nintendo wants you to know they’re sorry for excluding same sex couples in their game. MSNBC is extremely sorry for their Cinco de Mayo coverage. Hell. Eminem just apologized to his mom through song. These are the garbage apologies that have taken place this week. Last week there were more, and next week we are guaranteed to hear, “I’m sorry,” at least a half dozen, inauthentic times.

It’s time to stop apologizing for things that we really don’t want to apologize for in the first place. We as a society need to learn to relax and understand that everyone has their own opinion and just because it doesn’t agree with yours, it doesn’t mean it’s wrong. Let’s play a game shall we? You’re driving down the street and someone cuts you off. If it’s someone on a bicycle, even better. (Because bicyclists are Hitler with death rays, remember?) You spill your coffee all over you and you scream out, “You fucking asshole!” Now, let’s pretend that the person on the bike is your boss. Are you going to apologize to your boss for something you clearly meant? Of course you are because it was your boss and you’re a pussy. Now, imagine the world that I live in where I wouldn’t apologize to my boss for cutting me off. Fuck that, we’re not at work and she was wrong. She’s a fucking asshole for cutting me off. I’m not going to give her a fake apology. It’s like saying you’re sorry when you eat the last piece of pizza. You’re not fucking sorry, you are just a master of time management. You wanted it, you waited for it, you ate it. Don’t apologize when your fat face is full of delicious cheesy goodness. We all know you’re not truly apologetic.

Donald Sterling isn’t sorry for being racist. He’s an 80 year-old man who was raised in a time when racism wasn’t racism, it was a norm. He was around when there were white bathrooms and colored bathrooms. He was around when Jackie Robinson played his first major league game. It’s in his blood, and he’s a racist. What he is sorry for is getting caught and is feeling pretty sorry for himself that he is losing his team. He isn’t sorry for the way he thinks. We need to understand that. Is his opinion and thought process wrong? Of course it is, it’s antiquated and will hopefully go the way of the dodo with each passing generation. But it’s his opinion. The NBA isn’t sorry for the remarks either. It’s politically correct and they wanted to nip that in the bud right away. Don Jones doesn’t give a shit about his tweet. He still thinks the same way, he was just told by the team to delete it and apologize. MSNBC isn’t sorry. They offended two Mexicans and they called a hotline or raised a hashtag war. #whiny #alto

I know I’m not the only one that doesn’t care about these stupid apologies. In fact, I’m not the only one that doesn’t care about these stupid stories to begin with. This Donald Sterling thing is a minor story that turned into a huge deal when it really shouldn’t be. Disagree? You didn’t give two shits about the Clippers a month ago and you didn’t give a shit about Donald Sterling when he was being racist years ago. Lawyered. Sterling has always been a racist and has been literally awarded for his racism by throwing money at it. Thanks NAACP, you will give an award to Ames from Roots if he gave you a million dollars to line your pockets with.

Stop caring about this stuff. This is America and we sound like whiny little girls. So you got offended…. Tough titty said the kitty. Man up and drive on. So Charles Barkley said there are fat women in San Antonio. Well… Are there not? More importantly, why do you care about what some former NBA player says in the first place? Why do you care that some old dude is racist? Why do you care that another old dude is homophobic and hunts ducks? Are you worried about the millions of gay duck hunters out there that watch the show? For fuck’s sake people. Instead of worrying about what some asshole said, start demanding apologies for important things. Looking at you Christopher Nolan. That third Batman movie was a fucking train wreck.

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