I've always been a guy's girl.
In Kindergarten, I played rough with all the boys and I guess that just kinda stuck. While the three other girls in my small class were afraid of getting dirty, I readily swung myself from the jungle gym in a really aggressive game of tag. (Side note: I had to go home three times that year, because I had fallen too hard from those bars.) It was great! I was inseparable from the cutest boy in our class, all of the other guys wanted to be my friend and I could play as hard as I wanted!
As I grew up, I noticed it was just easier to befriend guys. There is a whole lot less unnecessary drama. They tend to be a little more welcoming. It also became clear that the older I got, the more likely these lines were to get blurred. Many of adult guy/girl "friendships" are, at the very least, rooted in flirtation. It might not be active, but it's still a "well, maybe if we've had a little to drink." Are they really my friends if they are also trying to get in my pants?
Then, it dawned on me! I've been missing out!
While I was playing with the guys, the girls were learning more about what it means to be a girl. I don't play games in dating, because I was too busy playing soccer. The girls on the sidelines were planning war strategy. I was just as clueless as the guys they were about to take down. And, like it or not, those girls always won!
Being friends with girls is so much more than that. By avoiding it for much of my life, I was lacking balance. When I look back, it's the times when I had a strong group of gal pals that I was really the happiest. Sure, there are a lot of women who are completely cray-cray. They create drama on purpose. They're really catty to each other. They gossip, back stab, try out for The Bachelor, etc etc. BUT, all that time I spent playing with the boys means that I learned how to weed those chicks out. I roll with an enviable crew.
Here are five reasons gal pals are awesome:
- There is strength in numbers. A group of girls works like a team. If there is a toxic guy, your girls will help keep you away. If someone is tearing you down, your girls stand you up. If you are having the best day of your life, sharing it with your girls makes it that much better.
- Only a gal pal will listen to you complain about a guy, your job and the fact that they didn't have your favorite color at the manicurist. That inane chitchat we all do when we're with our ladies is actually a very important part of bonding. It's just a fact of nature that a bonded group is key to survival. Also, guys try to be funny at the WRONG times. If I tell you that a guy said something toolish to me, don't counter with an equally toolish comment. Sometimes it sucks to be "one of the guys"!
- Girl time is often focused around looking gorgeous. Girls like to groom together. This is why gorgeous girls hang out with other gorgeous girls.
- Your relationship is based around some type of common bond. That's it. No confusion. You hang out only because you think that person is awesome and your personalities compliment each other.
- It takes some of the pressure off the guy you date. Yes, he wants you to rely on him. Yes, he wants to be there for you. But, it's helpful to spread that around a little. Want the guy, don't need him.