I recently read that the average American woman gets married at 25.6 years. At 25.4, I apparently am on the higher end of this average. In theory, marriage is definitely something I want in life. When I'm faced with the realities of this institution, my ring finger recoils in terror.
I want to get married, definitely. But, I see this as something that will happen in the future...the distant future. Why in the world are my peers choosing to pair off at this point in their lives? I am too young for this! Maybe, however, these aren't exactly my peers. None of my friends are getting married right now. We have bigger fish to fry...and there are plenty of them in the sea.
I look at these married couples and think that I would never want to willingly tether myself to their significant other...not for life! I don't want to cling to someone with a roving eye or who won't let me see my friends. I don't want to spend my life with someone who doesn't consider my feelings or make me laugh. Yet, I see all these couples forcing themselves to be unhappy. Maybe that's where we differ. Maybe they're entering this bond with an exit strategy in view. Of these 25.6 year olds, how many end divorced? I'm not playing that game. I don't want to enter into that sort of commitment, unless I'm truly ready to be committed and I'm secure in my choice.
I'm looking for a buddy. Someone who gives me the confidence to be the best person I am able to become. I want someone who will travel and adventure through life with me. Someone to hold my hand and enhance my experiences. And I want to be all that and more to him. I'm playing for keeps.
I don't think marriage or a relationship means that you should stop personal growth and epic fun. And if it does mean that, I am NOT interested. I'm not ready to settle down, but I'm completely ready to settle in. In theory, I'm ready for this. In reality, I just haven't met him yet...or he just doesn't realize he's met me.
I guess I'm just not average.
This begs the question, even with Pumas and Cougars, do we still consider unmarried women in their late-20s and 30s to be Old Maids or past their prime?