Let me introduce a new term to your vernacular: WAX. (Wack Acting eX). We've all got at least one.
The Delusion-ist is the guy who not only thinks that he can get you back, but thinks you are actively trying to get him back.
Mitch* and Suzanne* had a terrible break-up. One that involved him trying to make her jealous of every female he'd ever known and her staying with her sister every weekend so that she could handle the barrage of calls, texts and e-mails. After he finally got the point and things quieted down, Suzanne never looked back. He was just as crazy in the heat of the relationship as in its dying breaths. Several month later, Suzanne heard someone close to Mitch had died. She thought she'd be a nice person and offer her condolences. MISTAKE! Crazy doesn't just go away. Mitch told Suzanne that he'd been dating one of his female friends at the same time as Suzanne and also that she obviously remembered what a stud he was and that's why she contacted him. Reality: Suzanne and her best friend think Mitch looks like the Queen of England.
The Tragic 80s Movie
This is the guy who you'll find outside your window holding up a boombox and shouting his undying love. He probably has a letterman jacket hanging in his entryway.
Jenny, my best friend, dated a high school teacher for a couple months. He would give her all sorts of random gifts and write messages to her all throughout her apartment. (Editor's Note: I thought it was super creepy, but Jenny is a Leo and attention is her kryptonite.) The Teacher messaged Jenny one day and in uber dramatic fashion removed his name from the race. He felt she was not quite as into him as he to her. (Editor's Note: He was right!) Just yesterday, Jenny received a surprise package in the mail with characteristic uni-bomber scrawlings of love etched all over the wrapping. Inside was the most amazing relic I think has ever been unearthed in relationship history...............a video collection of The Teacher's band covering all of Jenny's favorite songs.
The Bunny Boiler
This is the ex who doesn't cope well with rejection....
Harry* and I had a passionate and brief relationship. He was very smart, creative and had gorgeous dark eyes. In the end, though, the issues we had were complete deal breakers and we had to call it quits. He didn't take it too well....... About a month later, I went with a bunch of friends to a Dewars Whiskey Tasting. (Let's just say that I now know whiskey tastings with my friends will only lead to a Red Headed Slut shot-a-thon at Pippins.) In my merry mood, I accidentally sent a one word text to Harry. Apparently, this was taken as an open invitation to jump back into my life. He texted and called me for about three days and I just ignored him. Finally, I told him to leave it and let it be a pleasant memory. Harry responded by saying that he would try to ruin my reputation and spread rumors about me. I had dated Harry for about three weeks.
What's your craziest WAX story?